Post written by guest blogger, RJ Kozain.

The drawn out bass and hip-hop melodies that made Portishead one of the driving forces of the trip-hop genre may be gone, but the vocals, lyrics, instrumental moods that make you want to hang yourself from your repressed depression are all still as vibrant as ever on their cleverly titled third album Third, their first studio release in eleven years.

Through black out-dark electronic, ambient and industrial influences, Beth Gibbons, Geoff Barrow and Adrian Utley deliver another masterpiece that is sure to be rotating in stereos across college music lover’s dorm rooms for years to come.
“Silence,” the albums opener track is definitely anything but what the title suggests. Hi-hats, pianos, electronic beeps that resemble something you’d hear when you press a panic button, and tribal percussion (amongst other layers) make the track sound like something you’d hear on the group’s self-titled 1997 release–if it were to be re-released in 2008. “Did you know when you lost?” Ms. Gibbons painfully moans over the track. Uhh..you didn’t lose anything. You still got the beat, Ms. Thang!

An abruptly silent cut off ends the first song and moves you into “Hunter,” which starts like a depressing down-tempo jazz track on drugs, moves into yet another round of electronic “THE WORLD WILL EXPLODE” beeps, and dives right back into suicidal-industrial jazz. This is probably the song that stays the most true to the Bristol sound (or trip-hop) genre.

“Nylon Smile” follows and brings the tribal beats back. The vocals start off with harmonies that could easily be stuck into a R&B tune if the melody wasn’t dragged out with Beth’s crazy voice. “I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve you..” she sings. I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve to have my ears ejaculating over every second of this CD so far, suicide woman.

If this kind of music is not for you, I am absolutely not lying when I tell you to hop on AmazonMP3′s download Third’s fourth track “The Rip” right now. RIGHT NOW!!! Absolutely everything about this song is shining and perfect. If anyone can find a flaw in this song, please tell me. Everything from the instrumental, the vocals, the lyrics, and the melody screams, “Put me on a Goldfrapp CD right now, damn it!” Synths! Oh god, the synths! Also, there is a random hi-hat at 2:33. Yes, a completely random hi-hat sound that makes the song even more special because it only happens once in the song–and its not expected at all. However, I don’t like how the song fades out just as the track is getting good. While this is the album’s best track, it could have definitely been developed into something more. Then again, Portishead always seems to fade out their tracks when its getting good. It’s their thing….

“Plastic” sounds like someone is trying to perform at a church, but a helicopter keeps flying over the place. It develops into a battle ground of guitars, electronic beeps and squeals, dark synths, and tom-tom drums. Its a song you’d hear during a down-tempo version of an opera. Hmm..a down-tempo opera, wouldn’t that be hot? “We Carry On” soon follows with a high looped electronic sound and if you extract the distorted bass, you could place it in a happy-bubbly t.A.T.u. song, where it’d sound just as good.

“Deep Water” offers a calm before the storm. It sounds like the group made a stop in Hawaii and decided to turn some Hawaiian tunes into a simplistic down-tempo vibe. They got it spot on! It also combines 1950′s style harmonies. This is the album’s happiest point, offering the lyrics “deep water won’t scare me tonight.” Awe..happy.

Just when you think someone gave this album some uppers, “Machine Gun” suddenly shoots the album’s only spark of joyfulness nine times in the heart and lets it bleed all over the cold, hard concrete floor while screaming “STOP SMILING, FUCKHEAD.” This song will not hesitate to shoot you…and it will not miss. Not once. Every other measure it offers a round of two percussive sixteenth notes in the form of industrial drums as Beth cries your death. She effing cries it. She knows you’re dying when you hear this track and by the time the distortion on the track comes on…you’re dead. That distortion, in my opinion, symbolizes your brain shutting down..but you’re still being shot. This track is most likely the hardest of hard when it comes to mainstream trip-hop and industrial music. Tricky also has the experimental beats and voice to make you die on the spot, but Portishead does it in a mainstream way. Whether premeditated or not, if I were the judge, they’d be found innocent of all charges pressed against them. (If you followed the extreme amounts of symbolism in this paragraph, I congratulate you.)

“Small” is the next track and starts off like a lot of songs on this album start off, with nothing but a guitar, it then moves into a single string instrument playing and morphs into trip-hop bliss. “Magic Doors” provides a Tricky-esque beat and ends with something that sounds like an elephant is being strangled before a hopeful and cheerful piano begins, which offers Third‘s most emotional climax of the entire album.

Before you know it, Small is cross-fading into the album’s closer track, “Threads.” Isn’t it sad? Your auditory orgasm you’ve been waiting eleven years for is already coming to a close? Yeah, I was a bit disappointed too. “Threads” offers another moment of past Portishead sounds, and is a great way to end the album. If you’re a fan of industrial trip-hop, you won’t feel let down in the slightest. This Portishead album is worth every single cent you spent.

Note: This album isn’t exactly for the pop lovers. It is an extremely long way away from the group’s international success, “Dummy.” But seriously, if you aren’t into this album, please hop onto AmazonMP3‘s (because iTunes DRM is the devil,) and download “The Rip.” You’ll get your money’s worth.

Still don’t believe me? Listen.
Portishead – The Rip (live)

And for those who picked up Portishead’s 1998 live release, I think we can both agree that they can still perform stunningly.