Christ on a Christmas cracker–the 2010 BRIT Award nominations are in!

I can’t believe it’s time already for the ceremony to begin once again. It seems like only yesterday I was sitting in my bed watching in disbelief as Gaga robo-danced her way on stage with pieces of shattered china plates glued to her lady bits. Ahh, memories.

As per usual (see 2009), I’ve gone ahead and bolded my favorites for the crown and added a few insightful comments and/or snooty one-liners to the end of each category.

And awayyy we go! (Thanks to The Guardian for the full list of nominees.)

British Male Solo Artist

Calvin Harris
Dizzee Rascal
Mika
Paolo Nutini
Robbie Williams

My vote is largely due to the Jedward pineapple incident, though many of the brilliant tracks off of Ready for the Weekend, including “Flashback” and “I’m Not Alone” should warrant this win alone.

British Female Solo Artist

Bat for Lashes
Florence & the Machine
Leona Lewis
Lily Allen
Pixie Lott

My vote is, hesitantly, for Lily. My favorite of the bunch is Florence, however I believe she deserves to take a few other awards instead. Obviously, I’d be fine with Florence snagging this one as well (Bat for Lashes deserves credit too!). Just don’t let this one go to Leona–her album was largely a stinker.

British Breakthrough Act (Top 5 selected by Voting Academy; winner chosen by Radio 1 listeners)

Florence & the Machine
Friendly Fires
JLS
La Roux
Pixie Lott

No competition. La Roux may have had a running shot if this were the summer of 2009, but Elly Jackson has since proven to be a ceaselessly irritating twit. Florence is a rare throwback to another time, and her talent demands and deserves recognition (especially in this category).

British Group

Doves
Friendly Fires
JLS
Kasabian
Muse

I like “Uprising,” and have hardly heard the musical output from the rest of the lot. That is all.

MasterCard British Album

Dizzee Rascal – Tongue n’ Cheek
Florence & the Machine – Lungs
Kasabian – West Ryder Pauper Lunatic Asylum
Lily Allen – It’s Not Me, It’s You
Paolo Nutini – Sunny Side Up

Lily’s sophomore attempt was a triumphant return to form, but Florence’s debut was nothing short of magical.

British Single (Winner selected by UK Commercial Radio listeners)

Alesha Dixon – Breathe Slow
Alexandra Burke Ft Flo Rida – Bad Boys
Cheryl Cole – Fight For This Love
Joe McElderry – The Climb
JLS – Beat Again
La Roux – In For The Kill
Lily Allen – The Fear
Pixie Lott – Mama Do
Taio Cruz – Break Your Heart
Tinchy Stryder Ft N-Dubz – Number 1

This one’s a tough one, but it’s Cheryl Cole that I’m going with in the end. Credit and love to Alesha Dixon and Lily Allen for bringing us two fabulous singles (and, to a lesser extent, La Roux and Alexandra Burke), but “Fight For This Love” was glorious post-Aloud gold. Besides, If anyone should steal this away from Joe McElderry, it ought to be his own mentor.

BRITs Performance of Past 30 Years

Bee Gees Stayin’ Alive/How Deep is Your Love (1997)
Bros – I Owe you Nothing (1989)
Coldplay – Clocks (2003)
Eurythmics & Stevie Wonder – Angel (1999)
Girls Aloud – The Promise (2009)
Kanye West – Gold Digger (2006)
Kylie Minogue – Can’t Get You Out of my Head (2002)
Michael Jackson – Earth Song (1996)
Paul McCartney – Live & Let Die (2008)
Pet Shop Boys – Go West (1994)
Robbie Williams & Tom Jones – The Full Monty Medley (1998)
Scissor Sisters – Take Your Mama (2005)
Spice Girls – Wannabe/Who Do You Think You Are (1997)
Take That – Beatles Medley – I Wanna Hold Your Hand/Hard Day’s Night/ She Loves Me (1994)
The Who – Who Are You (1988)

This category is all but impossible to choose from, but I’m going with what I know and love: As much as Kylie‘s performance was an iconic milestone in her career and Girls Aloud‘s brilliant rendition of “The Promise” was a triumphant “Finally!” moment after seven years of being snubbed from nominations, the Spice Girls were and will always be the definition of Brit Pop in my eyes. Performing at the frenzied height of their success in 1997, the Girls put on a show for the BRITs that puts today’s girl groups to shame.

International Male Solo Artist

Bruce Springsteen
Eminem
Jay-Z
Michael Bublé
Seasick Steve

Not much of a contest, and he’s only going to get bigger in 2010.

International Female Solo Artist

Lady Gaga
Ladyhawke
Norah Jones
Rihanna
Shakira

Nothing tops the Fame Monster, even if she’s irritating. This win will be timed well with her destined-to-be epic performance on stage later that night. (Big love to Riri, Shaki and Ladyhawke, but Gaga is unbeatable right now.)

International Breakthrough Act (Top 5 selected by Voting Academy; winner chosen by MTV viewers)

Animal Collective
Daniel Merriweather
Empire of the Sun
Lady Gaga
Taylor Swift

This is a weird mix. The most popular pop artist of 2009 pitted against what was largely considered the greatest indie band of 2009? Hmm…it’s the UK, and I say pop prevails. I’ll go with Gaga.

International Album

Animal Collective – Merriweather Post Pavilion
Black Eyed Peas – The E.N.D.
Empire of the Sun – Walking on a Dream
Jay-Z – The Blueprint
Lady Gaga – The Fame

The Fame? Honestly? It came out in 2008 here, and only eleven days into 2009 in the UK. Can’t we get over it, already? It’s down to a three-way tie between Jay, Gagz, and Animal Collective for the win, but I’m going to jazz this up and go with Walking on a Dream, a phenomenal album in its own right that deserves some attention as well.

And that is that.