BOW DOWN.
A legend appears: Flawlesstina, Empress of Former Flopitude, just uploaded a photo on Twitter late this evening.
With those luscious bubblegum pink lips, flowing golden locks and that peachy airbrush complexion–I’m sorry, did you hear that? That was the sound of a thousand wigs being snatched off in the distance.
“Getting my glam on today for a special shoot! XoXtina,” the Pop Goddess tweeted. But what kind of a special shoot? New music? Or is it for the second season of The Voice (due to which I am now famous and very rich, bitch)? Or perhaps for Secret Potion, Xtina’s sensuously stinky intoxicating new scent?
We just can’t be sure. We don’t have all the facts yet. But as one can plainly see, the yodeling Snooki Monster of yesterday has been slayed. Queen Legendtina has once again risen to her throne (made of unsold Bionic albums, as I noted in the New York Times) as a full-on Hollywood glamour girl. And the haters? Why, they stay mad. They stay mad.
Let’s get glam, bitches…
