Tomorrow marks a truly historic day in American history.

It’s a day in which we will all come together to decide–as a democracy–how to advance as a society. The decision will seal our fate as a nation and forever impact future generations: I’m referring, of course, to the decision to buy Ciara‘s second third latest One Woman Army single, “Got Me Good,” on iTunes.

There’s been plenty of heated debate over the past few weeks regarding “Got Me Good”: The term “legitimate slay” has been thrown around loosely. Chart statistics have been skewed in either direction. Some wigs have been snatched, while others remain tightly fastened.

But before you decide whether or not to purchase the single–it’s your prerogative, as a certain Spearitual warrior once sang–let us consider the facts one final time in favor of electing to go pro-CiCi.

1.) “Got Me Good” was produced by Darkchild. Darkchild was mysteriously sitting in a studio with Godney somewhere a few weeks ago. If you don’t support this song, you don’t support Godney’s career. And if you don’t support Godney’s career, you are a terrorist. Or a pressed Little Monster.

2.) “Got Me Good” features Miami bass/freestyle beats. Freestyle music is objectively amazing. There is a scientific study published about this. Somewhere. I think.

3.) “Got Me Good” includes complaints, such as “My back is aching” and “My bra too tight.” This is very similar to Robyn‘s “Don’t Fucking Tell Me What To Do,” except not really.

4.) The song’s current ranking on the Twerkability In Troubled Times Yearly Report (TITTY Report) rests at a solid “Twerktastic.”

5.) The video is AMAZING, and was directed by Joseph Kahn–he of “Toxic” and “Womanizer” fame. (And also “Poison” fame, but we all try to forget.) If you don’t support this video, you don’t support the videography of Godney, and are therefore a terrorist. Or a pressed Little Monster.

6.) “Got Me Good” was filmed in a windy desert, which means Ciara got sand in her eye at least once. That probably hurt, but she went on it for the love of the craft.

7.) Ciara remains the best dancer in the game.

8.) The dance moves are HOT FIYA. In fact, Ciara was quite literally burning up during the making of this video.

9.) A group of tweens from America’s Best Dance Crew called 8 Flavahz also danced in the video. If you don’t support this song and video, you hate children. And the art of dance.

10.) FOR GOD’S SAKE, CAN’T WE JUST LET CIARA BE GREAT FOR ONCE.

And now, let us listen to the song and watch the video for “Got Me Good” last time–and remember, your decision can change the fate of the entire One Woman Army era–and our country. May God have mercy on us all.

“Got Me Good” will be released on November 6. (iTunes)


About The Author

I'm like the ringleader. I call the shots.

  • Bridges

    I wasn’t sure if I wanted to go pro-CiCi on tomorrow’s monumental event but I definitely don’t want to be considered a terrorist (or a pressed Little Monster) so I’ll be getting the song on iTunes for the simple fact that after all the shade I have thrown in CiCi’s way and all the amazing punchlines she has given us in recent years, I feel like I owe this to her…. and to our country. And may the Lord have mercy on my soul.

  • http://twitter.com/ItsCMaddox Claudio Maddox

    LOVE this article, because I’m a fan of music and I’m not a pressed little monster. Nor am I a terrorist. Let Ciara be great (until Beyonce’s new album at least) :-)

  • Meowfie

    I don’t know ….Im more of a kelly rowland fan lol

  • Vote for Pop

    It’s about damn time. For years, I though CiCi needed to starting becoming (80s then 90s) Janet 2.0. She’s finally starting to lay the ground work with this. If she polishes up the dancing, and starts moving the productions forward, and brings some consistency, she could make the generally mediocre, overhyped, everyone screaming over vague similarities, album that is called Control 2.0. original? no. So what?

  • Vote for Pop

    It’s about damn time. For years, I though CiCi needed to starting becoming (80s then 90s) Janet 2.0. She’s finally starting to lay the ground work with this. If she polishes up the dancing, and starts moving the productions forward, and brings some consistency, she could make the generally mediocre, overhyped, everyone screaming over vague similarities, album that is called Control 2.0. original? no. So what?

  • Vote for Pop

    It’s about damn time. For years, I though CiCi needed to starting becoming (80s then 90s) Janet 2.0. She’s finally starting to lay the ground work with this. If she polishes up the dancing, and starts moving the productions forward, and brings some consistency, she could make the generally mediocre, overhyped, everyone screaming over vague similarities, album that is called Control 2.0. original? no. So what?

  • Vote for Pop

    It’s about damn time. For years, I though CiCi needed to starting becoming (80s then 90s) Janet 2.0. She’s finally starting to lay the ground work with this. If she polishes up the dancing, and starts moving the productions forward, and brings some consistency, she could make the generally mediocre, overhyped, everyone screaming over vague similarities, album that is called Control 2.0. original? no. So what?

  • Fré

    ****AGREE 100%

    Damn, read my mind. I NEVER buy music legally & I pre-ordered Xtina’s “LOTUS” album @FYE …(for the free poster lol) but…also the guilt I harbor for being a TRUE XTINA FAN [Lil Screamer(???)] & HATING so hard on her. I love Xtina & I don’t want her to stop making music! Even thought I secretly REJOICE when I see MuuMuse has spun a new “Floptina” masterpiece.

    I haven’t paid for an CD since “Born This Way” (only paid for 4 CD’s last year) & NEVER buy from Itunes.

    People call Ciara & Xtina flops but I love every Ciara & Xtina album, consistently good music regardless of sales/radio hits.

    Anyone out there… IF YOU LIKE AN ARTIST….

    INSTEAD OF US CALLING THEM “FLOPS” (and then secretly loving every other track of “Born This Way” “Basic Instinct” or “Bionic”) LET’S actually SUPPORT them.

    I have nightmares of Xtina/Ciara reaching *Amerie, Ashanti, Mya, Brandy etc..* level where people don’t even throw shade at them, because at this point they are non mother-****ing factors & go YEARS without new music :(

    *What is Xtina’s Fan Base Name? I read “LIL SCREAMERS” from somewhere & I love it.

  • Fré

    ****AGREE 100%

    Damn, read my mind. I NEVER buy music legally & I pre-ordered Xtina’s “LOTUS” album @FYE …(for the free poster lol) but…also the guilt I harbor for being a TRUE XTINA FAN [Lil Screamer(???)] & HATING so hard on her. I love Xtina & I don’t want her to stop making music! Even thought I secretly REJOICE when I see MuuMuse has spun a new “Floptina” masterpiece.

    I haven’t paid for an CD since “Born This Way” (only paid for 4 CD’s last year) & NEVER buy from Itunes.

    People call Ciara & Xtina flops but I love every Ciara & Xtina album, consistently good music regardless of sales/radio hits.

    Anyone out there… IF YOU LIKE AN ARTIST….

    INSTEAD OF US CALLING THEM “FLOPS” (and then secretly loving every other track of “Born This Way” “Basic Instinct” or “Bionic”) LET’S actually SUPPORT them.

    I have nightmares of Xtina/Ciara reaching *Amerie, Ashanti, Mya, Brandy etc..* level where people don’t even throw shade at them, because at this point they are non mother-****ing factors & go YEARS without new music :(

    *What is Xtina’s Fan Base Name? I read “LIL SCREAMERS” from somewhere & I love it.

  • Bridges

    I’m really focused in an artist music quality and not in how much they sell or how many #1 singles they get. And I mainly enjoy Xtina’s music (yes, even BIONIC) but her entire public persona is just so absolutely ridiculous that I can’t help but to hate on her a little bit lol Oh and I think her stans called themselves “Fighters” but I prefer how Bradley has recently christened them as “Lotus Petals” in one of his iconic Legendtina posts (I live/breathe for those fanfics) “LIL SCREAMERS” is brilliant tho but Xtina’s stans are WAAAAAAAY to uptight to call themselves that way.

    One last thing, to this day I still can’t listen to the clusterfuck of noise that is “Born This Way” Just like I’m doing with Nelly Furtado’s latest album, I pretend the BTW era never happened.

  • Lana

    Umm time for a new post you basic bitch! I ain’t here for 1 post every 4 days so chop chop!