Britney — err, Britishney — had the time of her life (translation: a jolly good time) last week in London Town, chatting with just about everyone in sight, whipping bitches into shape and buying tiny matches at a dollar store, because that is just what Living Legends do in their spare time. (So fire hot — a 20 out of 10!)
But while Londonney was busy doing #WORKBXXCHPROMO overseas, RCA Records president and COO Tom Corson and CEO Peter Edge, otherwise known as Britney’s Executive Bitches, were having a little sit down with Billboard to discuss business-y things and artists releasing albums during The Season Known As Q4, including Britney…as well as others artists who didn’t record Blackout.
They spent a good amount of time praising Kelly Clarkson‘s Wrapped In Red (YASSS KELLAY OMG U LOOK SO GOOD AND MARRIED, YASSS) and “Perfume” penner Sia for her upcoming 2014 studio album (which is going to be immense, SIA YASSS), until they finally got down to handlin’ Brit’s business (REFERENCE) with Britney Jean.
From Billboard:
Edge: We’re feeling really good about the Britney album. We’re not quite sure how the credits are gonna be, but Will.i.am’s really the main creative on the album — but he won’t be the only one. He has a lot of great songs. There’s a song we feel fairly strong will be the second single called “Perfume.” It was written by Sia and could be a big career song. It’s more of a downtempo song, but people are amazed at the quality of her vocals on it. She sings it beautifully and it has a real sincerity to it. And it’s outstanding — I think people are not only gonna be surprised but also see another side of Britney. There’s a lot more personal content on this album than we’ve seen from her in the past.
Of course, this isn’t anything we didn’t know, really. It’s going to be #SomethingMorePersonal? Duh. After all, the album’s tentative title for the past year was Blackout 2.0: It Gets Urbaner And Also More Spearitual And A Little More Personal (Raw). Also, “we’re not quite sure how the credits are gonna be” is industry speak for “the album’s not completely done yet.” You want song titles? You want a producer list? You better record, bitch.
The biggest news here is that the execs are seriously eying (or nosing?) “Perfume” as Single 2 because of its potential to be “a big career song.” Hello, “Born To Make You Happy”? “Not A Girl, Not Yet A Woman”? “Everytime”? Isn’t Balladney always a game-changer?
But until Vocalney decides to drop her big, sweet-smelling ballad scent from above to cause panic in the industry, do yourselves a favor: Head down to the local Kohl’s, grab yourselves a bottle of Fantasy 10th Anniversary Edition, sit at your vanity, spritz liberally, practice your Britishney with the girl (or boy) in the mirror and just try to act natural. (Oh yeah, and don’t forget to “Work Bitch.”)
Now, here’s the real question: Where’s the link to pre-order Perfume Fantasy? Or Perfume Radiance? Or just plain Perfume Perfume?
SLAY US, PERFUMENEY.
“Work Bitch” was released on September 16. (iTunes)