Sorry, that title should have been a spoiler alert.

Let’s try that again…

SPOILER ALERT: THERE’S WETNESS IN THE VIDEO FOR NICOLE PRESCOVIA ELIKOLANI VALIENTE SCHERZINGNOTMYSELFTONIGHTER’S NEW SINGLE, “WET”!

And guess what? I’m so proud of my Scherzy Baby! She’s really pulled it out this time!

Despite having only one day to shoot in between her hectic US X Factor schedule, the fabulous Pussycat Dolls lead brought pure fire to the set of the Justin Francis-directed “Wet,” her fourth single from her long-delayed studio debut, Killer Love.

Sure, the video starts off a little slow with a strut down an abandoned hallway (she seems poised to burst into a wicked routine, yet never does). But once the pool sequence kicks in, Scherzinger starts to uphold the good name of her very good Killer Love single: She gets WET!

Yes, Muusers: Writhing against a glass plate a la Brit Brit‘s “3,” the Hawaiian hottie turns up the heat and soaks down while her friends drain a pool. Why? There’s DANCING to be done. DUH.

From there on, the songstress starts to bring some serious sizzle: A fierce against-the-wall routine with some other sassy ladies! Sexy solo writhing on the floor! And best of all: a full blown dance sequence in the middle of the (now drained) pool! SO MUCH HAIR WHIPPING! SO MUCH HAIR TOSSING! YASSSSSS!!!

Sure, the plot-line literally makes no sense whatsoever (did Miss Scherzy and her crew really just bust into some random athletic facility to drain a pool, dance around and then bounce? Then again, sounds like a typical Thursday for me), but hey…who cares? The moves are HAUTE FIYUH!

Come to think of it, this isn’t the first time we’ve seen Scherzy crawling around some shadowy locale and taking a quick steamy dip. WAIT! That’s the video for “Whatever U Like”!

Hey…if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

“Wet” will be released on August 29. (iTunes UK)

~BLAH BLAH BLAH, LOOK AT ME: MY NAME’S WILL YOUNG AND I JUST RELEASED THE PERFECT VIDEO FOR THE PERFECT LEAD SINGLE FROM MY (PROBABLY) PERFECT UPCOMING FIFTH STUDIO ALBUM BUT I’M LIKE TOTES BORED RIGHT NOW SO I THINK I’LL JUST RELEASE A SONG THAT ISN’T EVEN ON MY ALBUM FOR FUNZIES JUST BECAUSE I CAN. PS: I LOOK TOTALLY FLAWLESS ON THE COVER ART, LOLOLZ.~

And that–if I had to guess–is exactly what flashed through Will Young’s mind before unleashing the completely free, completely amazing Pascal Gabriel co-penned (Rachel Stevens, Kylie Minogue) “The Way I See” onto Amazon.co.uk today.

The song is nothing short of a flawless pop gem: It sounds a bit like if you cracked open Britney‘s “Scary” and poured the bright ’80′s synthesizers into a bowl of Rachel Stevens’ Come & Get It, smoothed the mix over a lush Sophie Ellis-Bextor disco-encrusted mold and then sprinkled some sweet, sweet Will Young crooning on top to garnish.

Mmm…I’m going to be stuffing my face with this one for a while. Echoes truly cannot arrive soon enough!

DL: Will Young – “The Way I See”

Echoes will be released on August 22. (iTunes UK)

Another day, another drama…

In helping to celebrate Blackout Purchase Week (have you entered the MuuMuse giveaway yet?), MuuMuse is proud to present “Blackout Once Again: A Look Back at Britney Spears’ Greatest Album,” an incredibly comprehensive, in-depth examination of Britney‘s fifth studio album, written by Vertigo Shtick‘s David Salter.

If there’s anything to be said about Blackout, it’s featured here in this extraordinary piece. A must read, Muusers!

Please click “Read More…” to see the full article. (MOAH!)

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I know it’s summer in the city and the sun is high, so why not cool it down (or heat it up!) with a little extra summer lovin’ from one of MuuMuse’s favorite up-and-coming pop vixens…Mizz Jessie And The Toy Boys!

While the Toy Boy-minded songstress is currently gallivanting ’round the country as the opening act on Godney‘s Femme Fatale Tour along with NERVO and Nicki Minaj, Jessie’s also been hard at work cranking out brand new tunes for all her Fannequins.

Most recent of all? The Show Me Your Tan Lines EP, her super-fresh 6-track collection of gritty, naughty bubblegum electro-pop tunes released in June.

For your dance-around-your-room-in-your-underwear pleasure, Jessie is now Excluusively giving away two tracks for free on MuuMuse: The EP’s namesake, “Summer Boy,” and her debut single: “Push It” (The explicit version, but of course!)

Please go ahead and enjoy! And remember, if you’re digging these beats, grab the full EP on iTunes!

The Show Me Your Tan Lines EP was released on June 14. (iTunes)

Oh, you want more?

In late October of 2007, Britney released Blackout, her fifth studio album–a record largely considered to be one of her best albums to date (if not the best.)

After a last-minute switch-a-roo in Billboard’s chart rule that same week which allowed for albums sold exclusively by one retailer to be considered eligible for the charts, Blackout went on to debut at #2, stalling underneath The Eagles‘ massively successful Walmart-only record, Long Road Out Of Eden.

Much to the chagrin of every Britney fan EVER, Blackout is the singer’s only album that would not debut at #1–which she has since gone on to reclaim with her sixth and seventh studio albums, Circus and Femme Fatale. It’s also failed to achieve Platinum RIAA-certified status (over 1 million albums sold)–again, her only album that has yet to do so.

A few months ago, some of Britney’s biggest fans (as well as Britney.com’s webmaster, BRITannica!) banded together to brand this week–July 26 through July 31–as “BLACKOUT Purchase Week”: An attempt to get one of Britney’s best albums to #1 on the Billboard album charts and secure its long overdue Platinum certification.

From the official event page:

BLACKOUT is Britney Spears’ only studio album that has not reached Platinum status in the United States. At 988,000 units sold, we’re only 12,000 away from being certified Platinum! Some consider BLACKOUT to be one of Britney’s best albums to date, spawning hits such as “Gimme More,” “Piece of Me,” “Break The Ice” and fan favorite, “Get Naked (I Got A Plan)”. Purchase BLACKOUT the week of July 26-July 31 and let’s get this gem of an album certified Platinum! xx♥ Britney.com blogger BRITannica

Now, some real talk: While it would be Heaven on Earth to see Godney on top of the charts next week, I know there’s no actual way Blackout could ever climb to #1 this week. It’s just not something that can happen! And while I’ve heard that it’s quite possible that the album will indeed surpass the million mark required for certification according to SoundScan sales, the process isn’t an automatic one: The award has to be requested, verified, and purchased.

All that being said: Why Should I Be Sad? Let’s just Break The Ice and have a little FUN! You never know what can happen…

Besides, I see nothing wrong with wanting to celebrate Blackout: As one of my favorite records of all time, the album remains a crowning achievement for The Holy Spearit–and I would only be too happy to help celebrate. How? I Got A Plan!

MuuMuse is proud to be giving away two copies of Blackout, courtesy of Jive Records!

To win one of the two CDs, I want YOU to get creative and send me your Blackout-inspired creations at muumuse@gmail.com with the subject line “GIMME MOAH.”

It could be anything: Did you film your own version of “Gimme More” in your kitchen wearing your grandma’s old wig? Do you have a legendary “Piece Of Me”-inspired paparazzi photo collage hanging up on your wall? A drawing from Brit Brit’s flawless Blackout photo shoot? Or perhaps you’ve got an acapella version of “Toy Soldier” or a sick dance routine to “Perfect Lover” kicking around on that old YouTube account you ‘accidentally’ forgot to delete.

Whatever the case may be, I want to see/hear/feel/taste/smell it! (Okay, maybe not the last two…unless it’s Cheetos & Vanilla candle-scented!)

The second CD will be given away via Twitter. To enter, follow and tweet me at @MuuMuse with the following phrase:

“I want to #BLACKOUT with @MuuMuse! #BlackoutMuu”

The two winners will be selected and notified on Tuesday, August 2.

So go on and gimme a Freakshow! I can’t wait to see what you put on my Radar. (Blackout version, not Circus. Duh.)

Blackout was released in October of 2007. (iTunes)

HANG ON TO YOUR PORTUGUESE-SPEAKING PANTIES, Y’ALL: BRIT BRIT’S COMING TO BRAZIL!

The Living Legend (you can look, but seriously…don’t touch) hosted a live U-Stream session earlier today at 6 P.M. EST to announce some rather exciting news: She’s coming to South America, y’all!

Armed with two of her multilingual back-up dancers–HOLA MARCO!!! QUE GUAPO CHICO, MMM PAPI, AY AY, ETC.–the visibly terrified princess of pop ‘excitedly announced’ that–at long last–she would finally be returning to Brazil.

The camera then faded to reveal a rolling list of all TWO Brazilian dates–with the promise of 10 more South American dates to come.

Finally: The bloodthirsty Brazilian stans can stop spamming my comment sections with their unintelligible demands/casual death threats for Britney to come to Brazil! (They won’t stop, but I like to imagine this will end eventually…)

After breathing a huge sigh of relief and seeing off her dancers, Godney popped the gum she had hidden away in her hand right back into her mouth and carried on chomping in her flawless and iconic way.

FUCKING. LEGENDNEY.

2011: O ANO DO SPEARS.

Hanging onto your Frappes, Brit stans?

Godney took to Facebook today to make a very special video announcement for her fans–specifically of the Latino persuasion.

Watch as our fearless Spearleader–basked in a Holy Golden Spearit Glow–delivers a one sentence announcement while boldly, unabashedly staring straight into a cue card below the camera. “Check back into my Facebook page on July 25 to find out where my Femme Fatale Tour is heading after Europe. Adios, amigos!” she mutters. (Just between you and me–and this is completely a shot in the dark here–but I think she might mean South America!)

Oh, Brit Brit. You’re such a silly goose! But then again…who the fuck got time to memorize that shit?! NOT A LIVING LEGEND, THAT’S FOR DAMN SURE.

2011: EL AÑO DE LA SPEARS.

Another year, another MTV Video Music Awards, which means it’s time for a whole ‘nother round of Kanye rage and death threats from Britney stans demanding to know whether or not she’ll be performing this year.

But before we get into that whole mess–it’s the nominees for the 2011 MTV VMAs!

Last night, MTV opened up the vote for the 2011 MTV Music Video Awards. And almost just as quickly, the tweets began to fill up my timeline with various outbursts and damning remarks: #MTVFail! #MTVFail! So what’s got everyone’s panties in an Ashley Tizzydale? Let’s see who made the cut…below the cut.

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