♡♡♡

“‘Oh my God, you look just like Shakira! No, no–you’re Catherine Zeta!’ ‘Actually, my name’s Marina,’” she sang on “Hollywood,” the second single off of 2010′s The Family Jewels.

It’s been over two years since her debut, and Marina + The Diamonds is back with yet another identity crisis for her second go-around in the studio–and this time, she’s evoking a cold, cruel bitch named Electra Heart.

While crafting the follow-up to her 2010 debut, Marina originally turned down requests to head into the studio with bigger names. But after an extended period of solo writing sessions, she found herself unhappy with what was being produced. As she explained in an interview for the Electra Heart campaign, she finally gave into the idea of collaboration after meeting with producer Rick Nowels–which she called the best decision of her life.

Looking over the liner notes for this record, it’s easy to see that Electra Heart is a major powerhouse production–Dr. Luke, Diplo, Cirkut and Greg Kurstin are just some of the names involved–which has led many indie purists and/or music snobs to brand Marina a “sell out.” After all, here’s an artist who spent a good chunk of her first record working with indie-pop producers like Liam Howe, now stepping into the booth with the same producers who help shape radio smashes for Britney Spears, Rihanna and Katy Perry. For shame!

But for those willing to look beyond the star-studded names and actually pay attention to the lyricism and songcraft found on Electra Heart, it’s obvious that Marina Diamandis is written all over her second studio album–an even stronger, more cohesive set than its predecessor.

The transformation into the Electra Heart era began over six months ago, as the singer started to release grainy webcam photos of herself sporting a platinum blonde wig (it’s since been dyed, and really more of a grayish white now), along with a video series.

The first, called “Fear & Loathing,” found the singer snipping away her locks to a short black bob, and was soon followed by the clip for the campaign’s phenomenal (unofficial) lead single: “Radioactive,” still one of the best singles of 2011. The clip followed the singer, now sporting that blonde wig, as she traveled America with a bad boy in tow, stirring up trouble in convenience stores and hotel rooms in the dusty deserts of the heartland.

“Radioactive” never gained much traction in the UK, however–ultimately sputtering in at the lukewarm height of #25 on the UK Singles Chart. Whether a reaction to Marina’s partnership with the Norwegian dance-pop production duo Stargate, her new image or simply due to poor radio reception, the song was largely ignored by the general public. Nonetheless, it bought Marina some extra time to suss out the finer details of her upcoming project.

Inspired visually by the camp of The Valley of The Dolls, as well as by ponderings about the new, instant mini-celebrity age of Tumblr, Marina began posing in ‘60’s retro couture—as a suburban housewife, an idle teen, a homewrecker, a beauty queen (all lovingly referred to as “The Archetypes”)–to personify the spirit of heartbreak threaded throughout her upcoming effort.

“Primadonna,” the album’s storming lead single (after “Radioactive” was declared a buzz track) released earlier in April, was the world’s official official grand introduction to Miss Electra Heart: “Get what I want ‘cause I ask for it, not because I’m really that deserving of it,” Marina declares across the song’s surging beat; a colossal pop smash that most resembles Britney’s dub-pop masterpiece “Hold It Against Me.” (No surprises there–another win for Dr. Luke!)

With its cheerleader-friendly chants in the background (“Wow! Yeah!”) and sarcasm-soaked lyrics, “Primadonna” is the album’s cheekiest representation of Electra Heart: glitz, glamour, and nothing to offer of any actual value–like a well-produced dance-pop single from The Real Housewives franchise but with an added wink wink that says, quite Britishly, ‘I’m taking the piss.’

And so we finally have Electra Heart, a concept record with two personalities at play: There’s Electra, the ruthless anti-heroine of the record, and Marina, the quirky, dramatic singer-songwriter whom we’ve already met in different capacities on The Family Jewels.

Similar to Lily Allen‘s brilliantly acerbic It’s Not Me, It’s You from back in 2009, the album’s genius comes in the form of smart, mocking lyricism meshed with power-pop beats. (It makes sense too: Greg Kurstin, who executive produced Allen’s record, had a hand in a few of the tracks on Electra Heart as well.)

Beyond “Primadonna”, Electra Heart rears her platinum blonde head in the form of other hilariously deadpan anthems like the punchy album opener “Bubblegum Bitch”: “I’ll chew you up and I’ll spit you out, ‘cause that’s what young love is all about,” she triumphantly declares above the crashing beat, one of the many crafted by Nowels. That she uses the phrases “Soda Pop” and “Dear Diary”—two album tracks by our very own bubblegum pop Queen Britney (who she genuinely adores)–in the second verse is surely no accident at all.

“Homewrecker,” Electra’s cruelest cut of the bunch, sees our heartless heroine trouncing around and getting herself into plenty of trouble: “Deception and perfection are wonderful traits/One will breed love, the other hate,” she declares in an authoritative British accent above dreamy, atmospheric waves (and a dull buzz that sounds a bit like a tattoo needle humming in the background). All at once, she charges into the chorus: “And I don’t belong to anyone…they call me homewrecker!” she dramatically cries out. It’s an anthem for the morally bankrupt–something I imagine Marina had only too much fun writing for herself.

As with The Family Jewels, the greatest highlight of all—even with Dr. Luke, Diplo and Rick Nowels on board—is Marina’s lyrics. Like a cross between the quivering intensity of Fiona Apple, the black wit of Joan Rivers and the imagery-ridden power pop songcraft of Bonnie McKee, her way with words—wrought with humor (“I want blood, guts and chocolate cake”), bitterness (“You don’t love me, big fucking deal”) disarming honesty (“I just wanted to be perfect”), and thought-provoking ponderings (“No room for imagining, ’cause everyone’s seen everything”)–is simply unparalleled in the pop landscape. She’s a master lyricist.

The album isn’t entirely the work of Electra, either. Songs like “Starring Role”—one of the several highlights of the record—prove that underneath the gray hair, glamorous dresses and that heart-shaped mark on her cheek, it’s still Marina singing: “The only time you open up is when we get undressed,” Marina sadly sings. And despite her best attempt at defiance during the soldiering chorus, the song shines with its bitterness: “Come on baby, let’s just get drunk/Forget we don’t get on,” she offers.

The persona peels back even further on the utterly devastating “Lies,” co-produced by Diplo, Cirkut and Dr. Luke. Set against a pulverizing series of weird, winding gritty beats—reminiscent of Britney’s ex-sexin’ Femme Fatale anthem, “Inside Out”—Marina waves a white flag: “You’re never gonna love me, so what’s the use?” she sadly resigns. It’s all shades of perfection, although the acoustic version of the song released weeks earlier already proved that–even stripped of the brilliant electronic production by the talented producers–the song is one of the best tracks Marina’s penned, ever.

Apart from heartbreak however, the record also seems to find its fascinations in exploring issues of power and identity. Most obviously, of course, is “Power & Control,” a personal favorite of the album: “Women and men, we are the same/But love will always be a game,” Marina declares with a raised fist above the song’s surging chorus. With its hammering beats and damning piano melody twinkling in the distance (and an unbelievably incredible bridge of layered vocals and dance floor pulsations), the arena-sized power-pop number feels ready to split at the seams at any second.

It’s not the first time Marina mentions the power struggle between men and women, as with “Hypocrates”: “I know you only want to own me, that’s the kind of love you show me/You tell me one thing and do another, keep all your secrets undercover,” she sings above the big, sparkling guitar-pop tune which tinges with a breezy, almost ‘60’s pop flair, “American Pie” style. It comes as no surprise then that Electra Heart is hellbent on being no one’s bitch.

“Sex Yeah,” one of the incredible deluxe tracks of the record, finds Marina delivering one truth after another above a kicking synth-pop rock pulse, similar to Ladyhawke’s debut effort. “Question what the TV tells you, question what a pop star sells you/Question mom and question dad, question good and question bad,” she wisely offers in the first verse. “If women were religiously recognized sexually, we wouldn’t have to feel the need to show our assets to feel free,” she declares in the next. Feminist theory set against a surging, foot tap-friendly beat? Sign me up, please.

As the album slows to a contemplative finish, you start to wonder if this is Electra Heart’s tragically tormented inner dialogue or just Marina’s own self-consciousness. It’s not always easy to tell.

On “Teen Idle”—yet another one of the album’s shining highlights—Electra’s (or Marina’s?) anxieties come to a head in the album’s saddest contemplation (with the blackest sense of humor): “I wish I’d been a teen idol/Wish I’d been a prom queen fighting for the title/Instead of being sixteen and burning up the bible feeling super, super, super suicidal,” she sing-songs. Dreamily crooning about becoming “a real fake” and drinking the pain away, the song provides the album’s most food for thought (both chocolate and angel cake, in fact!) about growing up in the digital age of fame and instant celebrity.

Electra Heart is undoubtedly one of the best records of 2012, on par with Lana Del Rey’s Born To Die released earlier this year. Funnily enough, both share in an obsession with the glamour of vintage American life–possibly as a by-product of the two having a producer in common (Nowels). Yet whereas Lana uses Americana to evoke a certain nostalgia in her music, Marina takes classic American culture and molds it into much more biting, frank and cynical.

Somewhere at the intersection of a campy Broadway production, the raw angst of the ’90′s school of female singer-songwriters, unabashed bubblegum pop and just a touch of macabre exists Electra Heart, a collection of brilliantly crafted, smart pop songs with a healthy sense of humor that refuses to be any one thing. It’s an album that criticizes, indulges and wears as many hats as it damn well pleases. Or, in Electra’s case, wigs and diamonds.

Electra Heart was released on April 30 in the UK, and will be released July 17 in the US. (iTunes)

What’s that you say? Yup, Santi’s back!

Kicking off the promotion for her upcoming album with a bang (and a whole lot of dizzying doodle effects!), Santigold has just unleashed her “Big Mouth,” the first song and video from her long-awaited sophomore follow-up, Master Of My Make-Believe.

Produced by Switch & Portuguese electro-dance outfit Buraka Som Sistema, “Big Mouth” is pumped full of tribal drums, frantic electro bleeps and Kuduro rhythms, giving off big M.I.A. and Major Lazer vibes. (No surprises there–Major Lazer is the collaboration between Switch & Diplo, and M.I.A.’s worked with Buraka Som Sistema in the past.) As a result, you might even hear some of Beyonce‘s “Run The World (Girls)” and Nicola Roberts‘ “Beat Of My Drum” thrown in too!

“Got a big mouth, big mouth…you said enough!” Santi snaps during the maddeningly manic track, recalling the healthy helpng of sass delivered on Santigold‘s “Shove It.”

We already know that Santi’s a genre-hopping chameleon, so it’s difficult to make any real predictions about the sound of the new album just yet. But so far, it sounds like Make-Believe‘s going to be one mayjah dance party!

Liking what you hear? Well, good: She’s giving away for free on her official website. (iTunes)

Nicola Roberts is a different kind of pop star.

There’s just no getting around it, really: Ever since her name was called as one-fifth of the band that went on to become Girls Aloud during the finale of the 2002 reality series Pop Stars: The Rivals, the Lincolnshire-born redhead with porcelain skin stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the pristine pop quintet. There was something special about Nicola, something different–dare say “alternative” about the then 17-year-old songstress.

Roberts made her mark in the Aloud as the quiet, quirky vocalist responsible for some of the band’s most memorable moments–the opening seconds of “Untouchable,” the second verse of “Whole Lotta History,” the show-stopping bridge of “Call The Shots.” More often than not, it was Roberts’ shaky, vulnerable vocals that placed an ice-coated cherry on top of some of the Aloud’s finest work.

But being “different” can often be problematic, and for Nicola, induction into the Almighty Aloud was nearly a curse: From the get go, Roberts was relentlessly teased and bullied in the British tabloids for her appearance, as well as an apparent bad attitude: “Ginger.” “Pale.” “Ugly.” In 2003, Busted‘s Matt Willis pronounced her a “rude ginger bitch,” a nickname that the press fondly appropriated for years. And despite the best efforts made by her fellow bandmates to protect her against seeing the stories, Roberts was still well aware of the continuous public mockery, leading to several years of excessive drinking and an unhealthy obsession with tanning.

Lest anyone be confused and think she simply stood there and dealt with the criticism however, it’s simply not true: Nicola Roberts has always found ways to fight back.

During a performance at G-A-Y in London in 2003 for instance, the quiet crooner took a cheeky stab at Matt Willis’ attack by donning a black skirt with the words “RUDE GINGER BITCH…BOTHERD?!” painted on the back. Later on in her career, as Roberts slowly grew confident in her natural appearance, she would tackle her tanorexia head-on in an eye-opening BBC special, Nicola Roberts: The Truth About Tanning.

Now, with the release of debut record out on September 26, Cinderella’s Eyes, Roberts has gone one step further and turned the tables on her detractors completely with one loud, defiant rallying call: “TEAM GINGE.”

When Roberts’ solo campaign became public knowledge broke in early 2011, fellow Alouders Cheryl Cole and Nadine Coyle had already released their own solo efforts: Cheryl supplied the radio-friendly R&B-pop with smashes like “Fight For This Love” and “Promise This” with producers like Wayne Wilkins and Will.I.Am at the helm, while Nadine lent her tried-and-true diva pipes to Toby Gad and Guy Chambers-penned torch ballads and powerful pop tracks like “Insatiable.”

Roberts, as the running theme of her personal narrative goes, had something a little different in mind. Reports soon indicated that the singer was heading into the studio with indie-approved acts like Diplo, Dimitri Tikovoi, Metronomy, Dragonette and The Invisible Men, generating (accurate) predictions from the get-go that this particular Aloud member’s solo career would be the most ambitious, forward-thinking Aloud offering yet. “I didn’t want to play it safe and I didn’t want to make a record that was a guaranteed commercial success,” she told The Guardian back in June.

Out burst lead single “Beat Of My Drum” in May, an all-out assault of Diplo-produced jittery video game bleeps and blips, nonsensical electronica noise and a major cheerleader-approved chorus that found Roberts shouting–truly yelping–from the top of her lungs: “L! O! V! E! Dance to the beat of my drum!”

Every inch of the song was symbolic; the blossoming from the quiet, meek girl group member to a full-blown solo star of her own accord. From the lyrics (“Graduation, take a bow/See how strong you’ve made me now”) to the video, which featured an initially nervous Nicola taking to the stage and slowly taking over a gymnasium with a group of zany dancers and a ceaseless amount of booty bounces and cocky hair flips–put Roberts firmly in control of her career with her own brand of crazy, sexy, cool.

Even the vocals took most fans by surprise: Far from the gorgeously crooned, disco-friendly vocals we’d come to expect from Roberts while in Aloud, here was the same girl now utterly belting out a number with an odd, erratic mixture of Broadway-ready vibrato and ’40′s-era doo-wop wailing.

Roberts’ voice was even further highlighted in follow-up single “Lucky Day,” a sparkling, sing-songy track produced by Dragonette that found Roberts riffing up and down with all her might–nearly to the point of parody–against a backing track of glittery electronica and pounding beats.

Finally, on September 26, Roberts released her long-awaited solo debut, Cinderella’s Eyes, a collection of smartly crafted, endlessly cool electro-pop tunes.

Even the album’s gorgeous, Juergen Teller-esque campaign shots are as tasty as its contents. Decked out in ornate stilettos and brilliant designer threads filled with loud splashes of color, Nicola is pictured in a variety of brilliant poses: Sitting atop a kitchen sink cluttered with dirty dishes, walking a pony on a leash, scandalously holding a jar of dumdums between her legs, lying rigid against a hardwood floor–the perfect mixture of silly, chic and sophisticated.

Cinderella’s Eyes is largely an exercise in self-empowerment and self-discovery (though not without its fair share of self-doubt.) Unlike the all-too-assured “it gets better” anthems manufactured by hit-making machines like Katy Perry (“Firework”), Roberts’ record shines with a solid footing in reality: It’s not so much “It gets better,” it’s “It gets better…if you do something about it,” a rare shred of honesty that simply doesn’t exist in modern pop these days, and the kind of music that feels more inspiring and motivational than most other mainstream feel-good anthems today.

“Little girl, you got to do it for yourself / In a world where cards are so randomly dealt,” Roberts sagely advises on the album’s title track, one of the many moments of Roberts’ grand reclamation of her own destiny. Bouncing along an ’80′s synth beat, Roberts offers her well-intentioned advice through infectious hooks and melodies. “No more pretending there’s happy endings, you got to make one, make one,” she continues.

Fittingly, it’s The Invisible Men–the same producers behind one of the Aloud’s most forward thinking, game-changing smashes, 2004′s “The Show”–that claim responsibility to two of Cinderella’s Eyes‘ most thundering tracks: “Say It Out Loud” and “Take A Bite.”

Featuring deliciously rich vocal stuttering and layers upon layers of gorgeous electronica, “Say It Out Loud” is a euphoric moment of synth-pop, reminiscent of something Ellie Goulding might produce. “‘Cause the only medication / For a heart that knows it’s breaking / Is to get it out now, say it out loud…WOAH!” she shouts aloud on behalf of all broken hearts.

“Take A Bite,” meanwhile, grinds and grooves with along a rollicking drum ‘n’ bass beat that evokes an early Aloud brattitude…and even a rap to boot! “Called me a rude ginger bitch and say I bought bigger tits / They’re gonna eat all their words, they’re talking absolute shit,” she merrily sing-songs, taking one last jab at the nickname that’s haunted her for years.

Even the album’s lone cover, “Everybody’s Got To Learn Sometime,” a cover of The Korgis, is a no-brainer addition to the collection. Crooning on top of a slow-sizzling electronic groove, Roberts’ rendition converts the 1980 hit into a throbbing slow jam that fits in effortlessly with the rest of the production as she croons one of the album’s key themes: “Change your heart…it will astound you.”

But it’s when Nicola breaks away from the positivity on a few tracks however that the record becomes even more real–and to a degree, somewhat flawed. “i” is undoubtedly Nicola’s most unhinged moment, a Kate Bush-evoking slow jam that finds the songstress issuing out a laundry list of daily worries and aspirations on top of a hazy beat and groovy guitar strum straight out a post-LCD Beatles songbook. “I’m scared of dying and not trying, scared of getting old / I’m scared of telling lies, [in] case karma comes and eats me whole,” she warbles off-key. “I don’t like the people that leave comments on the Internet / They preach they’re perfect while they’re fucking you with intellect.” It’s both the best and the worst representation of the album–the most irritating moment vocally in some ways, but also her most vulnerable outpouring of insecurities.

Fittingly, it’s worth noting upon hearing “i” that Cinderella’s Eyes simply isn’t perfect: While the production and lyricism easily makes the album one of the best of the year, it’s Roberts’ newly discovered new pipes that occasionally throw off the record, often jumping from pleasant crooning to grating yelps in a matter of seconds. The shrill shrieks can often be cringe-worthy and–at certain points–nearly unbearable.

Even some of the album’s more uptempo cuts threaten to burst at the seams with their combination of Nicola’s vibrato-heavy vocals and big pop production. “Gladiator,” for instance, bounces along with the same happy-go-lucky pop energy as Sky Ferreira‘s “99 Tears.” But unlike Ferreira’s too-cool-for-school air that works so well with “99 Tears,” Roberts’ chirpy, Liza-like delivery comes across as downright annoying, making the unexpectedly naughty lyricism (“I got some KY, time to open wide!”) feel all the more…err, grating.

Vocal limitations aside, Cinderella’s Eyes still largely flourishes as a whole. And when Roberts isn’t busy bettering herself, she’s wearily ruminating on relationships gone bad.

“Yo-Yo,” a chilly mid-tempo, captures the essence of what made Girls Aloud so legendary while still remaining true to Roberts’ own personally narrative as she goes back and forth in a relationship gone south. “You come around, stop messing around / If you wanna be my baby please tell me now,” the singer pleads. And while you’re at it, prepare for the album’s most lush moment during the bridge–a full minute of shiver-inducing, Aloud-esque icy disco crooning: “You got me wrapped right around your finger / And I can’t let go, and I can’t let go,” she agonizes.

“Fish Out Of Water,” Metronomy’s other production aside from “i”–is perhaps the album’s most understated moment. Riding along a weird, warbling wave of ambient noise, Roberts tenderly ponders the loss of her first love. Of course, there’s also the song unbelievably gorgeous finish, as Nicola purrs in her (way underutilized) lower register: “Even if I have to go alone, I’d rather that then let you go, so I’ll face the road unknown.” It’s a chilling moment that surely would have been another one of Nicola’s show-stopping lines in an Aloud offering.

Yet while all the electro-encrusted gems dispersed throughout the record represent Nicola’s quirky personality, nothing quite epitomizes Cinderella’s Eyes like its final moment: “sticks + stones.”

Floating along a sad, haunting melody, the album’s closer is a fearless, be-all end-all account of Roberts’ experience as a member of the Aloud, featuring a bridge that might as well be a page ripped directly from her diary during the mid ’00′s:

Too young to buy my own bottle of vodka
So I’d beg the driver please I need another
How funny that I was too young for so many things
Yet you thought I’d cope with being told I’m ugly
Over and over I’d read it, believe it
Said no to the shrink I can fix me I think
I got friends in my head they’ve got me on the mend
I am pretty in my mirror, easy to pretend
17 and thought that I’d won the jackpot
Seems I didn’t read between the lines of this one
I can’t think why I could of made you so, so angry
Your bullets I don’t feel them come on and fire at me

In the same vein as Christina Aguilera‘s legendary “Beautiful” (albeit with a more personal touch), as Roberts reassures once and for all: You’re not alone–a touching way to signal the end of her debut.

“With all their mean words, they’re ugly / Starting to see I’m lucky, and that’s enough,” Roberts tenderly concludes at one point. If that isn’t one of the most powerful pop lyrics to be uttered in years, I honestly don’t know what is.

Cinderella’s Eyes would certainly be considered a solid attempt for any debut artist–let alone a girl group member-turned-solo star (a category from which the end results are so rarely satisfying.)

Yet while Roberts has successfully made the transition from the shadows of the Aloud into the spotlight as an act in her own right, her debut is often weakened due to a delivery gone unrestrained; the result being a series of shrieks and yelps (which is perhaps to make up for nearly a decade of being subjected to quiet crooning in the background) that isn’t always the easiest to endure.

Still, thanks to her emotional honesty, charming wit, and ability to avoid any and all pandering (i.e. no club cuts or cliche love songs), Nicola has forged her own unique musical identity as a solo act while taking a stand once and for all against the bullies. There’s a kind of solace in Cinderella’s Eyes–it’s real, it’s relatable, and it’s one of the best offerings of 2011.

By all accounts, Team Ginge has won the war.

STOP YOUR ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE.

Sometimes, in life, things happen that are so incredible they actually defy explanation. This happened to me last weekend at Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week in New York, when I was brought face-to-face with rising popstrel, Dr. Luke protege, and Britney Spears collaborator Sabi, who was DJing at the Teen Vogue Haute Spot.

Sabi is best known for, among other things, making everyone in the world say “Who?” when her guest spot on Femme Fatale was announced, elevating Cobra Starship’s “You Make Me Feel” into a compulsively listenable track with her dope-ass hook, and releasing a truly superb pop-dubstep hybrid buzz track called “Wild Heart,” which you should definitely listen to if you haven’t already.

She is also responsible for literally the greatest lyric in the Britney Spears oeuvre: Her audacious pronouncement during her rap on “Drop Dead Beautiful” that a nearby gentleman has her “steaming like a pot full of vegetables.”

In what is possibly the most important news item you will read this year, I can reveal to MuuMuse readers excluusively here that Sabi not only is prone to steaming like a pot full of vegetables, but also steams vegetables of her very own. “I do steam my vegetables,” she confirmed. (It should be noted that Sabi was an incredibly good sport about the whole thing, and also looked super cute in polka dots and leather shorts. Bold, Sabi. Very bold indeed.)

When I told her that my initial intent was to bring a steaming pot full of vegetables for her, she laughed hard and said, “I would have died.” She has requested that on our next meeting, she be greeted with vegetables. (Direct quote: “Next time you see me, bring a pot full of vegetables.” Hopefully this will be included in her rider going forward.)

Sabi also talked about recording her upcoming album, due out in early 2012, which she reports will be “urban-rooted, mixed in with pop [and] alternative.” The album, she says, will also feature more of the dubstep influences that we heard in “Wild Heart”: “When I heard some of the dubstep that’s coming from the UK, I was like, ‘Oh my God, that’s crazy, can I do something like that?’ On my album, I’ve been honing in on my sound — and I might do a feature that’s another dubstep record.”

Expect the album to include more collaborations with Dr. Luke, who Sabi says is “so skilled… and the nicest guy ever,” as well as tracks with Benny Blanco, Toby Gad, and Diplo (!). Her only criterium, she says, is that “they bring me hotness.”

You’re welcome.

Thanks to Alex Goldschmidt for providing moral support, and also for promising Sabi that next time we saw her we would bring her “a bushel of vegetables from the farmers’ market.”

Sam Lansky is a contributor to MuuMuse.

HOMAHGAW. HOLD ME TIGHT.

It’s real, it’s actual: Here’s your first listen to Nicola Roberts‘ debut single, “Beat Of My Drum,” as well as its accompanying B-side, “Porcelain Heart,” courtesy of We Are Pop Slags.

“Beat Of My Drum”

IT’S SO GOOD AND THEN THE CHANTING OF THE L-O-V-E AND THEN THE HAPPY-GO-LUCKY DIPLO BEAT AND THEN THE SPEAK-SINGING M.I.A. FRIENDLY-NESS OF IT ALL AND THEN I CAN’T EVEN.

“Porcelain Heart”

IT’S SO GOOD AND THEN THE REAL SINGING AND THE LUSH, DARK DISCO BEAT AND THE SOPHIE ELLIS-BEXTOR FRIENDLY-NESS OF IT ALL AND THEN I CAN’T EVEN.

Dead. Coffin. Done.

“Beat Of My Drum” will be released on June 5. (Pre-Order from iTunes UK)

It’s Friday, Friday…and you know what that means: The unveiling of Nicola Roberts‘ solo music plans!

The Ex-Alouder’s official website has just been refreshed–including a news section, a personal diary and a mini store to pre-order the singer’s debut single “Beat of My Drum,” as well as her upcoming debut album due out in Autumn: Cinderella’s Eyes. (For a limited time, you can pre-order signed copies of both. Can you guess what I put my credit card to use for this morning?)

From Nicola’s official website:

On 5th June Nicola will launch a brand new chapter in her sparkling career with the release of her first-ever solo single, the brilliant Beat of My Drum!

Nicola worked on the track with Dimitri Tikovoi and Diplo, and the single is the first to be taken from her forthcoming debut solo album Cinderella’s Eyes which will be released this autumn!

Nicola had this to say on the eve of her new pop assault: “for over a year, I’ve been in the studio writing my own songs and working towards making my own record. The time has come where I have to come out of my safe bubble that is the studio and share my music with you…. butterflies just got worse…”

Along with the news, Roberts also uploaded a special video teaser of the behind-the-scenes recording process for her album, which includes a portion of the instrumental for “Beat of My Drum,” which a PopJustice forum member has graciously uploaded. In case you want to listen again, it sounds like this:

Boy, Diplo just loves him some “Pon De Floor,” doesn’t he? So spacey! So 8-bit! Sounds promising–can’t wait!

“Beat of My Drum” will be released on June 5. (iTunes UK)

STOP YOUR ENTIRE LIFE AND EVERYTHING IN IT.

The LEGEND that is Nicola Roberts (of Girls Aloud fame) has just begun rolling out the promotion for her forthcoming debut solo single: “Beat of My Drum,” reportedly produced by Diplo & Switch. (I can’t even believe I’m typing these words!)

The glamorous ex-Aloud member just unveiled her official website and Twitter account today with a single tweet: “4 days to go…”, along with a promotional photo by UK fashion designer, Henry Holland (pictured above).

The (seemingly) official single cover comes directly from a TwitPic, which cropped up earlier tonight courtesy of the PopJustice forums.

Given that Nicola’s donning the same shoes as in the promo shot and the same logo, I’m fairly 100% this is real. The source also went on to reveal that the single will be released on June 5, featuring a B-side called “Porcelain Heart.” STUN-NING!

The Juergen Teller/Marc Jacobs overexposed high fashion treatment. The stilettos. The song title. The producers…it’s all so perfect! This is exactly the treatment she deserves. I’m already shaking with anticipation!

This is simply everything. E-V-E-R-Y-TH-I-N-G!

Beyoncé will be featured on the cover of March 2011 issue of French fashion magazine, L’Officiel.

The magazine, which is currently celebrating it’s 90th anniversary of publication, just uploaded a behind-the-scenes clip of the shoot featuring the leggy legend in African-inspired haute couture.

The photo shoot is likely the first of many promotional appearances to come before the follow-up to 2008′s I Am…Sasha Fierce, which is reportedly nearly complete.

In an interview with MTV Australia last week, Sia revealed that she’d just submitted a track for consideration on the record, although the album is already almost done: “Well, there’s only one song left for this album, so I probably won’t get on this album, but hopefully the next one. That’s my dream, that’s my goal.”

Sia is just one of the many writers and producers tapped to work on the next record, including indie noise-rock group Sleigh Bells, Ne-Yo, Jim Jonsin and Diplo. As Sleigh Bells guitarist Derek Miller told NME: “Beyoncé works with whoever she wants to work with, probably 30 or 40 producers.” As of right now, none of the producers are officially attached to the project.

But with the recently confirmed headlining set at the Glastonbury Festival in June (the first female headliner in the festival’s history–about time!), it’s a near guarantee that we’ll be hearing something new from Miss Beysus very shortly.

BEST YEAR OF POP EVARRRR.

“I’m not talking about making it free, I’m talking about making it freer,” M.I.A. announces on Vicki Leekx, which was released at midnight on December 31.

And so, she has: Vicki Leekx is M.I.A.’s second free mixtape after 2004′s Piracy Funds Terrorism, this time bolstered with a bit more star wattage on the production front thanks to the likes of Danja, Munchi, Diplo, Blaqstarr, Sugu Aruler, Switch, Rusko, and So Japan.

Fans who found themselves put off by the unpolished grit and wailing screeches of /\/\/\Y/\ will find much to love in the Vicki Leekx mixtape, a continuous mix that polishes the best gems from M.I.A.’s last album, wraps them around the bounciest beats of Arular and worldly influences of Kala, and then sends them speeding into the next century with stellar, intergalactic dubstep sound.

Vicki Leekx is a concentrated moment of mania, jumping between beats and samples at breakneck speed–from the Arular-esque electro-eclecticism of “Super Tight” to the tribal, “Boyz”-like “Tamil Beat Munchi” (which includes a brilliant moment in sampling with Nicki Minaj‘s verse on Kanye West‘s “Monster”), to the gloriously scathing “Generation -N-E-Y”–a track originally leaked on one of M.I.A.’s many odd, ugly .GIF-heavy landing pages that cropped up earlier in 2010. “You think you’re bad, you think you’re so fucking cool,” M.I.A. snarls above the song’s monstrously grinding beats. It’s an utterly major attitude attack–and arguably the mixtape’s finest moment.

To be fair, though–while the music is supreme, the politics remain hopelessly muddled. As Sputnik Music member Conrad Tao points out in his own review of the mixtape, M.I.A. is a seemingly endless barrage of contradictions. Apart from her own personal hypocrisies, it’s never really clear what M.I.A. is exactly criticizing (Money? The government? The Internet? Facebook? Hipsters? Everything?)–and to what to degree she’s even being serious. To try and analyze this mind-melting mishmash of sociopolitical motifs would prove impossible–there’s simply too many inconsistencies.

Yet political motivations (or non-motivations) aside, M.I.A. has rolled out a solid, concise production with deep, thumping beats and stuttering vocals that bang as hard as anything else released last year. Vicki Leekx is basically the epitome of why I first fell in love with M.I.A. back in 2005: It’s provocative, it’s addictive…but above all, it’s fucking cool.

DOWNLOAD THIS NOW.

Here we go again: The end of another year in music!

2010 may well be remembered as the Year of the Future (if not the Year of All Hearts–hint hint!): A year of fembots, androids, bionic women and time-traveling adventures deep into the 22nd century.

Space-age love stories and robo-dramatics colored a large portion of the year’s biggest releases in pop, no doubt a response to the reign of the machine on the pop charts as synth-pop productions continued to dominate the digital airwaves in 2010.

Below is the list of MuuMuse’s Top Albums of 2010, which was based on a variety of factors–from individual song and single goodness, to the complete album experience, to overall artistic integrity, to an album’s ability to ‘stick’ as the year progressed. Basically I’m trying to say that it’s a bit of a hot mess, but I tried my very best.

There’s also a rather controversial dishonorable mention prior to the Top 40 list that will likely blow my chances for that much coveted position as editor of Rolling Stone. DAMN IT.

Now…LET’S DO THIS.

BUT FIRST. The (dis)honorable mention:

And now, a brief but important word regarding an album released this year: Heidi Montag‘s Superficial.

First of all, let me clear the air: Heidi Montag has no soul or integrity as a human being. She is a silicone robot, mindlessly pre-programmed with a ceaseless appetite for fame and physical perfection as determined by only the most impossible, superficial societal standards set by beer-guzzling bros with a hankering for dim-witted bimbos with big blonde hair with even bigger boobs. She once remarked that she was deeply disappointed that her plastic surgeon could not increase her breasts to Size H, as she wanted them to be “Size H…for Heidi.”

She may, in fact, be the Antichrist.

That being said, her album is so good. It is so good, in the most purest and truest sense of a “guilty pleasure.” I’m sorry–actually, no. I’m not sorry. It just is. I realize that she is not actually “singing,” nor that her robot voice is even “good,” but these songs are just amazingly trashy and delicious. Much in the way that Paris Hilton‘s debut album is genius, Montag’s effort is genius because she blew a cool $2 million on some of the best songwriters, including Cathy Dennis, The Runners and Steve Morales.

So that my conscious remains clear, I am putting this out in the open: I listened to Heidi Montag’s Superficial about as much as I did the Top 3 albums of 2010. I know I mostly ripped her to pieces in my album review, but even then I admitted it was a “fun” album. Well, it’s still fun. Assess accordingly.

With all that being said, I cannot–in good mind–add her to this Top 40 list. I just can’t. Although I’ve yet to tire of this record, I cannot knowingly sandwich this woman anywhere near the actual Titans of Pop. I refuse to give it a number.

Therefore, I am officially honoring Heidi Montag’s Superficial with MuuMuse’s Official Best Worst Brilliantly Terrible Awfully Amazing Award for 2010.

Unfollow me, degrade me or banish me to Hell, but I SHALL BE SLUT-SHAMED NO LONGER.

———–

AND NOW…THE LIST.

40. Nadine Coyle – Insatiable (Album Review)
39. Kat Deluna – Inside Out
38. Ciara – Basic Instinct
37. Uffie – Sex Dreams & Denim Jeans
36. Keri Hilson – No Boys Allowed

35. Usher – Versus
34. Girlicious – Rebuilt
33. Linda Sundblad – Manifest (Album Review)
32. Katy Perry – Teenage Dream (Album Review)
31. Miley Cyrus – Can’t Be Tamed

30. Selena Gomez & The Scene – A Year Without Rain
29. The Wanted – The Wanted
28. Joe McElderry – Wide Awake
27. I Blame Coco – The Constant
26. Shontelle – No Gravity (Album Review)

25. Wynter Gordon – The First Dance
24. The Saturdays – Headlines
23. Simon Curtis – 8-Bit Heart
22. Alesha Dixon – The Entertainer
21. Jessica Mauboy – Get ‘Em Girls

20. Goldfrapp – Head First
19. Diddy Dirty Money – Last Train To Paris
18. Diana Vickers – Songs from the Tainted Cherry Tree (Album Review)
17. Jónsi – Go
16. BT – These Hopeful Machines

15. Janelle Monae – The ArchAndroid
14. M.I.A. – /\/\/\Y/\ (Album Review)
13. Marina + The Diamonds – The Family Jewels (Album Review)
12. Sade – Soldier Of Love (Album Review)
11. Christina Aguilera – Bionic (Album Review)

10. Sia – We Are Born

MuuMuse Review

Sia’s fifth studio album found the incredibly talented artist in a much brighter and bubblier place than ever before, dancing atop Greg Kurstin‘s bright, hand clap-happy pop production on irresistibly catchy cuts such as “Clap Your Hands,” “Bring Night,” and the stunning cover of Madonna‘s classic, “Oh Father.”

Yet all’s not quite sunshine and lollipops: The album’s more brooding numbers, including “Cloud” and “I’m In Here,” (which may well be the best ballad she’s done since the iconic “Breathe Me”) proved that Sia’s still grappling with plenty of inner demons brewing beneath the surface.

With We Are Born, as well as the multiple tracks penned with Christina Aguilera, Sia proved herself responsible for some of the year’s best crafted songs.

9. Rihanna – LOUD

MuuMuse Review

Stepping away from the darker imagery of her career-defining 2009 masterpiece Rated R, Princess RiRi eased her way back onto the pop radio charts in the latter half of 2010 with her gigantic club smash (“Only Girl (In The World)”) and a freshly revitalized, breezy new spirit.

LOUD is a concise collection of unapologetic, celebratory pop tunes inspired by the Barbadian beauty’s island roots, including “Cheers (Drink To That),” “Raining Men (feat. Nicki Minaj)” and the album’s impossibly infectious second single, “What’s My Name?,” featuring Drake.

While it’s mostly all fun and games here, it’s the album’s slower moments, such as “California King Bed” and “Love The Way You Lie (Part II),” the stunningly vulnerable response to her summer smash collaboration with Eminem, that provide enough versatility to hail LOUD as one of the year’s best offerings.

8. Scissor Sisters – Night Work

MuuMuse Review

Night Work quickly became the essential soundtrack to a summer’s night out after it’s release in late June of 2010, as frontman Jake Shears, Ana Matronic, Del Marquis and Babydaddy grunt-and-strutted their way through a powerhouse set of sweat-soaked disco gems seemingly unearthed from the filth-ridden dance floors of Studio 54.

While cuts like the falsetto-heavy heaven of “Any Which Way” and the scandalous purr of “Skin This Cat” gave Night Work plenty of sizzle, it’s truly the album’s final 6-minute opus, “Invisible Light” (featuring an almighty monologue by Sir Ian McKellen) which catapulted the band to a whole new dimension of brilliance.

7. Ke$ha – Animal / Cannibal

MuuMuse Review / MuuMuse Review

It’s hard to believe that Ke$ha only officially debuted this year.

Kicking off 2010 with the release of her debut album Animal on January 1, the filthy princess greeted the New Year with a somewhat uneven collection of drunk-pop party anthems (“Tik Tok”), vomit-drenched club stormers (“Take It Off”) and unexpectedly sobering ballads (“Hungover”). The rest is chart history, as each month K$ continued her reign on top of the Billboard Hot 100 with single after single.

As the year drew to a close, Ke$ha wisely took a hint from Lady Gaga‘s winning Fame Monster 2009 re-release formula and complimented her debut with Cannibal, a near flawless 8-track EP filled with darker, harder pop cuts. From prowling for boy blood on the storming title track “Cannibal” to getting all out rude on top of the grinding, Bangaladesh-produced “Sleazy,” K$ offered up a glitter-drenched middle finger to any and all naysayers standing in the way of her trash-pop reign.

Love her, hate her, or if you just kind of want to vomit on her face–it’s impossible to dispute the fact that K$ knows how to write a hit. Just wait until she starts singing for real…she hasn’t even begun yet.

6. Hurts – Happiness

Brooding in black and white, the men of Hurts delighted us all in 2010 with their keen sense of sharp style and sophistication (and irony, as their album title would dictate.)

Happiness is an incredibly rewarding dark pop experience and an incredible debut effort, rich with heartbreaking lyricism and big, moody synth-pop tunes that often recall the best of Depeche Mode and New Order. The album is largely dominated by deathly serious numbers and gorgeous, hymn-like devotionals including “Illuminated” and “Stay.” Best of all is the aching “Devotion (feat. Kylie Minogue),” which wonderfully recalls one of the greatest songs of the disco diva’s career, “Confide In Me.”

Moody, sophisticated…it’s the complete package. What more could a boy ever ask for?

5. Kanye West – My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

Like Rihanna’s Rated R from last year, My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy found hip-hop’s leading innovator in a very, very dark place.

Along with self-aggrandizing brag attacks including “POWER” and the stomping growl of “Monster” (which arguably features the greatest verse of Nicki Minaj’s career), the album shines brightest when West turns inward, as demonstrated in the tender defeat of “Blame Game (feat. John Legend)” and the disillusioned world-weariness of “Lost In The World (feat. Bon Iver).” Best of all though is the album’s star-studded collaboration featuring eleven vocalists (!) “All of the Lights,” a perfect rallying call that comes roaring into the airwaves, horns blaring.

With some of the most gorgeous melodies and unique samples (Gil Scott-Heron‘s “Comment No. 1,” for instance), as well as a lengthy list of both heavyweight collaborators (Jay-Z, Kid Cudi) and surprise contributors (Elton John? Chris Rock?), the world’s biggest ego has truly crafted one of the most intriguing, controversial and powerful releases of his career.

He may be a douchebag, but Kanye West’s album is about as close to perfection as they come.

4. Ellie Goulding – Lights/Bright Lights

MuuMuse Review

As the hotly tipped, much hyped artist at the top of the BBC’s Sound of 2010 list last year, Ellie Goulding had a lot to prove in 2010. Luckily, she did–and then some.

After forging a friendship with up-and-coming electro-pop producer Starsmith, the electro-pop chanteuse carved out a truly knock-out debut in Lights, an effort that perfectly marries the singer’s fragile vocals with bright, bubbling electronica and hazy synth-pop. Along with lead single “Under The Sheets” and the truly magical “Starry Eyed” (which rightfully earned her a spot at the top of the BBC’s list last year), more introspective numbers such as “This Love (Will Be Your Downfall),” “Your Biggest Mistake” and the utterly chilling “Wish I Stayed” demonstrated Goulding’s supreme penchant for songcraft.

Later in the year, Bright Lights was released–the re-release of Lights. Along with fan favorite “Lights” (produced by Richard Stannard‘s genius pop writing troupe, Biffco), the re-release boasted six additional tracks that sparkled with brand new instrumentation and more complex construction, including the Fred Falke-produced “Home” and Goulding’s stunning take on Elton John‘s classic, “Your Song.”

Packaged together, Lights and Bright Lights burn bright as one sublime, ethereal pop experience.

3. Kylie Minogue – Aphrodite

MuuMuse Review

With 21st century pop mastermind Stuart Price at the helm of the project, Kylie Minogue has divined the perfect pop record within Aphrodite, her most cohesive effort since 2002′s Fever.

Along with lush, electro-pop club anthems (“All The Lovers”), surging trance cuts straight out of the Stuart Price playbook (“Closer,” “Cupid Boy”) and gorgeously cooed, angelic waves of electronica (“Everything Is Beautiful”), Miss Minogue’s invoked a whole new brand of sass on this record, including the stomping, gritty ‘tude of title track, “Aphrodite” and the year’s greatest kiss-off track, “Get Outta My Way.”

Along with signature celebratory anthems, including the Starsmith-produced “Put Your Hands Up (If You Feel Love)” and the sparkling album closer “Can’t Beat The Feeling,” Aphrodite continues to inspire an electric euphoria that can only be described as heaven-sent.

2. Kelis – Flesh Tone

MuuMuse Review

Never one to shy away from reinvention, the ever-innovative Kelis came roaring back after an extended hiatus with Flesh Tone, a truly astounding body of work.

Essentially the equivalent of Madonna’s Confessions On A Dance Floor for the new decade, Flesh Tone found Kelis taking a step off the streets from 2006′s Kelis Was Here and into the discotheque with the help of such 2010 dance production legends as Benny Benassi and David Guetta, as well as executive producer/Black Eyed Peas mastermind, Jean-Baptiste.

Aside from its flawless production value, Flesh Tone‘s quality lies in its transcendence of typical dance floor lyrical cliches, utilizing deeply personal memoirs (“Song For The Baby”), existential ponderings (“22nd Century”) and a healthy helping of rallying empowerment cries including “Scream,” “Emancipate,” and the defining life anthem “Brave” to create one of the strongest, most cohesive collections of the year.

1. Robyn – Body Talk

MuuMuse Review (Part 1)

After almost a five year wait since her last studio album, her 2005 Swedish self-titled masterpiece, Robyn completed her triumphant return to the global pop forefront in 2010 with Body Talk, the year’s most forward-thinking, relentlessly hard-hitting collection of heartbreak disco-pop gems, bossy hip-hop taunts and super slick futuristic interludes beamed in straight from 20 years into the future.

To be fair, it’s hard to spotlight Body Talk in its own right: Robyn actually released three mini-albums over the course of a year–Body Talk Pt. 1, Pt. 2, and Pt. 3–with Body Talk being a culmination of all three released in November. As it stands, Body Talk is a mostly perfect ‘greatest hits’ representation of all three releases, with only a few missed opportunities (the most glaring of which being the exclusion of Body Talk Pt. 2 sassy sleaze track, “Criminal Intent.”)

In some cases, Robyn flexes her bossy ‘tude, bragging ’round town on tracks like the reggae-infused, Diplo-produced “Dancehall Queen,” “U Should Know Better (feat. Snoop Dogg),” and the brooding, braggy “None of Dem (feat. Röyksopp).” Elsewhere, she exposes doubts, fears and frustrations in cautionary tales including the throbbing cautionary tale “Love Kills,” “Get Myself Together,” and the Max Martin-produced “Time Machine” (her first collaboration with the pop production titan in over a decade), all the while providing some of the most danceable rhythms and relatable lyrics of the year.

Yet if anything remains true of Robyn as an artist, it is her ability to make music that resonates on a profoundly emotional level. Devoid of pretentious higher meaning or lyrical cliches, Robyn simply emotes, and the results are nothing less than completely relatable.

The album’s true highlights come in the form of three major singles, all of which acted as lead tracks for each Body Talk installment: From the chilly, rapid-fire devastation of “Dancing On My Own,” to the sugary sweet “Hang With Me,” to the all-or-nothing, head-over-heels recklessness of “Indestructible,” the Swedish chanteuse’s finest offerings mesh heartfelt love notes with pulsating, space-age rhythms, resulting in the greatest sad disco numbers since her 2007 global smash with Kleerup, “With Every Heartbeat.” When all’s said and done, each song is enough to render any unsuspecting listener into a quivering mess of glitter and goo at the discotheque.

While Robyn would never see the sales, radio or chart success that most of the aforementioned artists enjoyed throughout the year (the year’s greatest pop injustice for sure), it’s her ceaseless ability to deliver innovative, forward-thinking pop that ultimately places Robyn’s Body Talk series as the clear front-runner amongst the albums of 2010.

Quite simply, Body Talk is the embodiment of pop in its purest form.

———–

AND THERE YOU HAVE IT.

Now for some real fun.

Because I’m such a physical freak (in so, so many senses of the word), I now present a RATHER EXCITING CONTEST:

MuuMuse is proud to be giving away ONE BUNDLE of ALL TEN of MuuMuse’s Top 10 Albums of 2010!

To enter to win, send me an e-mail with the subject line “MUU10″ telling me your TOP 10 SINGLES OF 2010.

This contest IS global. Rejoice, Muusers all over the world!

A winner will be selected and notified on January 2, 2011. Good luck!