And now: The 2011 MTV VMA’s Tribute to Britney Spears.

As with anything Spears-related, there was a whole lot of hype beforehand: Would Godney take to the VMA stage once again in a moment of redemption with a triumphant, show-stopping performance of “Hold It Against Me”? Would the stage be crawling with A-list pop stars paying tribute to Britney, including some weird, stupid Demi Lovato, Selena Gomez, Miley Cyrus 3-way action as promulgated by the overly horny rumor mongers of BreatheHeavy’s stan-o-torium, Exhale? No, no…there was none of that whatsoever.

After an awkwardly long introductory speech by Lady Gaga–I’m sorry, I mean Jo Calderone (which was more or less just a speech about Britney’s influence on, well, Lady Gaga), a tiny fleet of little ladies ran out to deliver their, err…homage: A dance!

In what must have been…oh I don’t know, approximately 45 seconds, the little girls served us their best Baby’s First Hip-Hop Recital moves against a turbo speed mega-mix of the teensiest sliver of Britney’s musical output over the past 13 years. It was pretty cute, aside from the unforgivable ‘sexy’ gyrations that would have Pedobear grinning from ear to ear.

But don’t worry: There’s more! Out trudged Gaga once again–sorry, Jo Calderone, ugh–to present the award to a beaming-but-clearly-nervous Britney.

I’m sorry, did I say present? I meant deliver the world’s most indulgent, annoying character piece (that mercifully carried on throughout the entire night!) while sneering, laying on gross flirty lines and giving Britney those incredibly rape-y bedroom eyes. Soon enough, the two awkwardly stood eye-to-eye, just about to kiss. But from somewhere deep within, Britney looked to the light and saw Jesus: She pulled away and rejected the Gaga, exclaiming: “No, I’ve done that already!”

Ha HA! So funny! Love you, Brit Brit! And then she took to the microphone and started…introducing Beyonce! Because apparently introducing Beyonce to the stage is the new acceptance speech! And then she…um, kept praising Beyonce! And then Gaga started talking about…Beyonce! And then everyone just sort of looked around…and then Beyonce took to the stage! And that was it.

Wait…WHAT?!

Now look: I’m not shading the little ladies that danced. Good job, girls! Good job. But as for the rest of this hot mess express: REALLY?! Of the entire “tribute,” 60% of the time was dedicated to Gaga’s showy performance as Jo Calderone, 35% an introduction to Beyonce’s upcoming performance, and 5% actual dedication to The Holy Spearit.

Simply put, there was no actual tribute to Britney during the MTV Tribute to Britney Spears. Sure, there were some little ones dancing to her videos, but that’s nothing I don’t already serve up on a nightly basis alone in my room in my underwear. A 30 second video message beamed in from Madonna or Janet Jackson would have been a hundred times more legendary, or even 10 seconds of Britney saying something about her decade-long career other than a humble “Thank you” and shout-out to Michael Jackson in between Gaga’s awful rambling. ANYTHING!

As a lifelong fan of Spears, the tribute was nothing short of an insult.

Later in the night, we would watch as Katy Perry accepted the award for “Firework” as the Best Video of the Year while wearing a giant yellow block on her head, thus–as I tweeted earlier–skillfully placing a giant fail-sized cheese cherry on top of this truly incredible shit sundae.

As Britney once said in For The Record: I’m sad.

Sounds like: Carrie Underwood, Miley Cyrus, Selena Gomez
Genre: Pop rock, country, dance pop

Meet Ashlyne Huff, a Nashville-bred singer-songwriter.

Huff is the daughter of the incredibly accomplished, award winning country producer and guitarist Dann Huff, whose production credits can be found in the liner notes of albums from the likes of Faith Hill and Carrie Underwood, as well as guitar credits on countless MuuMuse favorites, including Laura Branigan‘s “Self Control” and DeBarge‘s “Rhythm of the Night.”

In August of 2009, Huff released her debut single, “Heart of Gold.” The song saunters along with a country twang of venom a la Underwood’s “Before He Cheats”–a sound that Huff concedes is entirely of her own upbringing: “The songs are pop, but I’m from Nashville, I write like a country singer,” she explains in her biography. (That her own father was on board to help shape the sound of Underwood’s debut career probably couldn’t have hurt much either.)

On May 11 of 2010, Huff released her debut self-titled EP, a six track collection of pop-rock tracks that showcase a variety of different sounds from the up-and-coming singer–from punchy, catchy cuts like “Trippin’ It Up” to the unexpectedly aching guitar power ballad “Sweet Nothing.”

Now, Huff plans to release the first single from her forthcoming debut album, Let It Out: “White Flag,” a purely dance-pop affair.

Though the chorus melody is entirely derivative of Miley Cyrus‘ “Party in the USA” and the noisy synthesizer beat plays similar to the Ke$ha/Katy Perry sound that dominated much of 2010 (plus a touch of Madonna‘s “Celebration”), “White Flag” is still enough of an addictive, crunchy dance-pop offering in its own right to merit attention.

“Everything seems to be yours / I don’t want to want to fight no more,’ Huff surrenders atop the glittering chorus. Coupled with the most deliciously catchy bridge (“Left, right, turn around, there you are!”), Huff might just have found the winning formula for a breakthrough into the mainstream scene.

Click below to stream the song–and enjoy a free, guilt-free download of Huff’s “White Flag”!

DL: Ashlyne Huff – White Flag

“White Flag” was released on January 18. (iTunes)

So here’s a post I’ve meant to do for over a month.

Jessica Mauboy is the runner-up from the fourth season of Australian Idol.

For those who haven’t encountered her name yet in their musical journey, a very brief history: Jessica Mauboy has a very listenable and melodic voice, comparable to that of Jordin Sparks, Alexandra Burke or Charice. Following her exit from Idol, the singer released her electro-tinged R&B debut in 2008, Been Waiting. The record spawned about a half dozen radio smashes, including the two very good singles that first caught my attention two years ago: “Been Waiting” and “Burn.”

On November 5 of this year, Mauboy released Get ‘Em Girls, the follow-up to her debut. ‘Urban’-flared and even more radio-friendly than her first album, Get ‘Em Girls nearly bursts at the seams with a dizzying array of American and Australian producers and co-writers, including Bangladesh, Harvey Mason Jr., Audius, Brian Kennedy and even the legendary Billy Steinberg (who penned Madonna‘s “Like A Virgin”)–not to mention the artist guest list, featuring Snoop Dogg, Ludacris and Iyaz. Not too shabby!

Though a somewhat eclectic bunch, the talent medley totally worked for Mauboy, resulting in a what proved to be one of the better albums of the year. (See–it even made the MuuMuse Top 40 list!)

Two songs from the album have already been released as singles (“Saturday Night (feat. Ludacris)” and “Get ‘Em Girls (feat. Snoop Dogg)”), although both songs were coupled with shoe-string budget clips that make Girls Aloud‘s “Something Kinda Ooooh” video look groundbreaking.)

Singles aside, I wanted to share one of my favorite album tracks: “Maze,” which was produced by Fredro (who’s also responsible for album tracks “Can Anybody Tell Me?” and “Forget Your Name”) and co-penned by one of my current songwriter crushes, Claude Kelly.

Fredro, the song’s producer, is a Swedish-born writer who first began making waves in the early ’00′s producing for about a zillion of MuuMuse’s most approved acts including Shontelle‘s “Ghetto Lullabye” (!), The Sugababes‘ “Switch” (!!), and Holly Valance‘s “Hush Now” (!!!), as well as another former Australian Idol contestant–Season 1 winner, Guy Sebastian.

Claude Kelly is the same man responsible for co-penning Britney‘s “Circus” and “Shattered Glass” (I know, I KNOW…deep breaths!), Miley Cyrus‘ “Party In The U.S.A.” with Jessie J, and a handful of the better offerings from Christina Aguilera this year, including “Woohoo,” “Desnudate,” and arguably Burlesque‘s best number, “Express.” As one of his latest productions now soars up the Billboard charts (Bruno Mars‘ devastatingly good “Grenade”), I’m fully anticipating the talented songwriter to dominate in 2011.

So that is that, and now we have “Maze”: A fantastically slick, electronica-infused R&B scorcher.

The song is particularly fantastic because it somewhat recalls JoJo‘s legendary “Too Little, Too Late” in that the chorus is very anthem-like and triumphant/inspirational sounding, when in fact the actual message of the song is rife with inner turmoil and a certain degree of sadness.

Speaking to its ‘explosive’ quality, “Maze” basically contains approximately two and a half choruses. First, there’s the pre-chorus (“Yeah, ’cause…one minute you want my tou-ee-uch, yeah / Next minute you don’t want none”).

Upon first listen, it seems like this could be the song’s decent chorus–but it isn’t. IT JUST FEEDS INTO A BETTER ONE: “OOOOOH! Should I stay or should I GOOOO?”

But then, something EVEN MORE AMAZING happens toward the end of the actual chorus: “Your heart is like a MA-EE-AY-ZE!” J. Melly bellows and repeats, rendering the listener physically incapable of doing anything except throwing their head back and hollering right along with the Aussie R&B songstress.

In conclusion: “Maze” is a-MAZE-ing. Do you see what I just did there?! LOLOLOLOL.

Get ‘Em Girls was released on November 5. (Australian iTunes) (Been Waiting is available on US iTunes).

The 2010 American Music Awards aired live tonight. I live-tweeted the event. Well, most of it. (The Walking Dead came on at 10–I do have my priorities, after all.)

So, rather doing a rather drawn-out summary of the affair, I figure I’d just regurgitate what I just said–except with pictures and video links. Lazy, right? Oh, and if you couldn’t tell yet, you should totally be following me on Twitter.

Like Diddy-Dirty Money says…LET’S GO!!111!!! (I luv Jesus.)

LET’S GO!!!

Living in a world without Girls Aloud is hard.

Luckily, there are girl groups continuing to pop up all across the Pop Universe. Let’s take a trip ’round and Introduuce the latest offerings, shall we?

Read More…

Oh, Milers. It was only too obvious: After the wing spreading sexual awakening that was “Can’t Be Tamed,” this bird has truly flown the coop.

Above is the newly released video for “Who Owns My Heart?”, the second Rock Mafia-produced single from the former tween superstar’s moderately good album, Can’t Be Tamed.

See, it’s like this: If you tell a bratty 17-year-old superstar to stop faux-making out with the other girls, what’s a girl to do but just faux-make out with even more of ‘em?

It’s a classic case of “Oh, you want more? Well, I’ll give you more,” except that this sort of thing isn’t really scandalous to anyone these days. Well, aside from Family First organizations, the elderly, bleach blonde conservative talking heads on 24-hour news networks, and the bulk of suburban America.

Okay, so it’s bound to ruffle some feathers.

Still, this is a fairly by-the-numbers ‘I’mma get buckwild in da club’ production: Glittery garb, gropes, and split-second glimpses all over of young Cyrus’ supple, exposed flesh. (Somewhere, a straight man quivers.)

And as one of Britney‘s most hardcore stans, it’s easy to spot B references all over this ish (most glaringly “My Prerogative”) including the writhing around in bed, the club scenes, the hair flips, and the butt shots in the mirror.

Well, except for this look. This one’s pure Cyrus:

Y so chola, Mileycita?

“Who Owns My Heart” will be released on October 26. (iTunes)

“Rollerblades” is the nice and lovely second single by the bright and bubbly Eliza Doolittle, one of the newest acts signed to Parlophone.

While the song is a great little Lily Allen-esque whistle-while-you-work sort of choon, the video provides three main avenues of thought:

+ Oh my God, Eliza Doolittle looks just like Miley Cyrus.
+ Who jumps straight into a couch lying on the sidewalk? In New York City, no less! Surely she must have bedbugs now.

However, my thoughts are best represented by YouTube user diamond14441′s sentiments in the comment section:

if the song if called rollerblades then why is she on a bike

The world may never know.

To learn more about Eliza Doolittle, check out her official site or her MySpace.

UK Muusers can preview and purchase Miss Doolittle’s album on iTunes UK here.

So, this is something new and interesting.

The night before my interview with Sky Ferreira, I received a vaguely mysterious e-mail from MuuMuse reader Sam Lansky with an attachment entitled “Fame Fatale.” The e-mail suggested that the attached may assist me in preparing for my interview.

As soon as I began reading, I already knew: This had to be published immediately.

“Fame Fatale” is not only a remarkably in-depth analysis (and personal account) of Ferreira’s curious rise to fame, but a thoughtful contemplation of the manufacturing of the modern pop star and the very conventions of the music industry itself. It’s extremely well-researched, poses tough questions, and deserves your full attention.

With his permission, I’ve asked Sam to feature his article on MuuMuse. It’s an incredible piece, and I do highly recommend that all of my Muusers give it a thorough reading–even if it’s “tl;dr” territory.

I do, after all, hope to keep a literate company.

Click “Read More…” to read Sam Lansky’s “Fame Fatale: The Rise of Sky Ferreira.”

Read More…