Yes, you read that correctly. What? Yes! No, I know. Stop crying. I can’t believe it either. Just–here, keep reading.
Illuminati Thug Life Tattoo-Having Navy Commander Princess Rihanna and Queen Ginge Nicola Fucking Roberts are launching a fashion talent search together for Sky Living HD in the UK.
RiRi, who is executive producing AND appearing in this production, has enlisted none other than Girls Aloud‘s Nicola to seek out up-and-coming fashion designers for a 10-week competition to find the next best British talent.
From Sky Living:
The show will celebrate the extraordinary talent and creativity in the British fashion scene. With Rihanna, a fashion icon herself, and Nicola, who created her own Dainty Doll make-up range, at the helm, the show will recognise the increasing influence popstars have on mainstream trends.
With her world-class reputation and passion for style, Rihanna is perfectly placed to find an aspiring designer worthy of the chance to break into the hugely competitive world of fashion. Tasking Nicola with fronting the search, Rihanna will be heavily responsible for casting and will be involved in editing post-production.
Rihanna – who has sold 20 million albums – will also be hands-on as the programme showcases Britain’s most promising fashion designers. Over ten weeks the unknown designers will be challenged by Rihanna and Nicola to create outfits for a string of musicians and celebrities.
The final challenge and ultimate task for the winner will be to design a unique stage outfit for Rihanna’s Wireless performance in Hyde Park in July 2012.
Honestly, this is kind of the greatest thing I’ve ever heard of in my entire life. Like…Project Runway gone RiRi? Will challenges include finding the right material for hip twerking and cake baking? Will Nicola Roberts beat her drum and toss Dainty Doll foundation at contestants as they’re booted off the show? WILL THEY BE PERFORMING TOGETHER?! I’m getting faint.
The show is now taking applications, so if you’re as good with a needle as you are with a bag of flour and some icing, click here for all the details.
This news makes me feel like…
Princess Illuminati Jeep Wrangler Ruff Rider RiRi has only just started settling down after unleashing the video for her latest single, “You Da One,” and finishing out her massively successful LOUD Tour in Europe, but she’s already onto the next one with Talk That Talk.
Last night, the Bajan beauty posted the single art (see above) for her new single “Talk That Talk (feat. Jay-Z)” on Twitter, the title track off of her latest studio album.
Now, “Talk That Talk” is nice and catchy and all–well, aside from that verse by Jay, which is decidedly One Of The Worst Guest Verses Of All Time (“I’m Flying out to Pisa/Just to get some pizza” – Jay-Z, “Please stop” – The World)–but it’s certainly no “Where Have You Been?”.
I’ll say it because we’re all thinking it: If Rihanna doesn’t release “Where Have You Been?” as a single, it will be the greatest pop crime committed against the world since Britney failed to release “Inside Out” from Femme Fatale (well, yet anyway). Or since Kelis‘ Flesh Tone flopped on the charts. Or since…I don’t know, but IT’S JUST WRONG, OKAY?!
Nevertheless, “Talk That Talk” is a solid mid-tempo banga, and I look forward to having “Yeah, boy I like it/ Yeah, boy I like it…” stuck in my head on repeat until the end of time when it utterly slays at Top 40 radio in the next few weeks.
Talk That Talk was released on November 21. (iTunes)
filed under: Adele, Britney Spears, Charli XCX, David Guetta, Katy B, Kesha, Lana Del Rey, Marina And The Diamonds, MuuMuse Excluusive, Nicole Scherzinger, Rihanna, Robyn, Sia, Sky Ferreira, Will Young
Two weeks ago, I presented my Top 25 Albums of 2011. Now…it’s time for the Top 50 Singles of 2011!
If the album list was tough, this was one step short of impossible, Shontelle style. Between rock-solid offerings from my favorite pop princesses, to stunning debut tracks from some of MuuMuse’s Most Anticipated artists, to throbbing dance floor bangers from DJs and producers worldwide–there was simply too much to love in 2011!
As a result, the list took a while. I didn’t sleep. I didn’t eat. I haven’t bathed. I’m literally a disgusting music-minded mess right now.
BUT NOW IT IS COMPLETE!
This is a list of 50 of my favorite offerings of the year (plus one honorable mention which was never actually released as a single.) Since I am giving like the Baby Jesus, I’ve created a full playlist of all my Top 50 tracks on Spotify. You are welcome in advance.
So without further ado, check out the full list below. Remember: If you have a problem with the final ranking, please…don’t hold it against me!
RIHANNA NAVY…WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?!
On November 22, we found love in a hopeless music industry when Bajan Illuminati Size Queen Navy Commander Princess Rihanna unleashed her glorious sixth studio album: Talk That Talk.
Now I’m all drunk on love (did you read the MuuMuse review yet?), and I’ve gained approximately 750 pounds from all the birthday cakes I keep baking and eating every five seconds (I love it).
But we all want love, don’t we? DON’T WE? Or am I just a fool in love? Didn’t think so. That’s why…
MuuMuse is proud to be giving away ONE AUTOGRAPHED COPY of Rihanna’s sixth studio album, Talk That Talk.
To enter to win, watch ‘n’ learn: Simply follow me on Twitter at @MuuMuse and tweet me with the following phrase…
Yo @MuuMuse: You da one that I think about alway-ay-ays! Now give me that signed @Rihanna CD, bitch! #TalkThatTalk http://bit.ly/s3Ddov
One winner will be randomly selected and notified on December 29. US entries only, please!
Good luck and godspeed. Now roc me out!
filed under: Adele, Beyonce, Britney Spears, Clare Maguire, Kelly Clarkson, MuuMuse Excluusive, Nicola Roberts, Rihanna, Royksopp, Sound of Arrows, Will Young
There’s no way around it: 2011 was an astoundingly good year in pop music.
Not since the 2007 reign of Kylie‘s X, Britney‘s Blackout, Rihanna‘s Good Girl Gone Bad and Girl’s Aloud‘s Tangled Up has there been such a strong showing in pop: We found love in the most hopeless of places, hung onto a moment and danced to the beat of our drums ’til the world ended (well, until next year anyway.)
As per usual, I’ve hemmed and hawed over a final ranking for my favorite records released over the past year. Although I wasn’t initially going to rank them numerically (YAY–everybody wins!), I ultimately realized that was just a cop-out.
Nonetheless, every album featured on this list deserves to be on included on everyone’s iPods and Spotify/iTunes libraries (or, dare I say it, in your CD players), because they’re all beautiful in their way.
Now, I present my Top 25 Albums of 2011. And if you’re not satisfied with the ranking? Please…don’t hold it against me.
Today, our glorious and all-knowing Illuminati Navy Commander Princess RiRi has finally unleashed her sixth studio album, Talk That Talk. IT’S A CELEBRATION, BITCHES! Now which one of you baked the birthday cake?
If you didn’t know all this already…um, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?! Check out the MuuMuse review right now! I’m drunk on love–with the album, that is! Just kidding. I’m also drunk right now.
That’s why I want to share the love with YOU, ’cause you da one that I dream about all da-a-ay!
MuuMuse is proud to be giving away 5 COPIES of the standard edition of Talk That Talk.
Want to enter to win? Watch n’ learn: Just follow me on Twitter (@MuuMuse) and show me your cockiness (I love it) by tweeting me with the following phrase:
I love it, I love it, I love it when you tweet it @MuuMuse! #TalkThatTalk
Five winners will be randomly selected and notified on Monday, November 28. US entries only, please!
Go on: Do ya thang and enter now! Who knows? You might find love in a hopeless place. Good luck and farewell!
Talk That Talk was released on November 21. (iTunes)
filed under: Alex Da Kid, Britney Spears, Calvin Harris, Chase and Status, Dr. Luke, Ester Dean, Hit Boy, Madonna, Rihanna, Stargate, T.I.
Does any other pop star’s album art talk the talk quite like Rihanna‘s?
Two years ago, the black and gray sheen and jagged metal “R” logo perfectly exemplified the grim, post-apocalyptic noir of Rihanna’s 2009 masterpice Rated R, as the singer menacingly peered out from behind her hand while suited in futuristic space gear, looking like Grace Jones beamed in from the year 3000.
Just a year later in 2010, Rihanna smoldered on the cover of LOUD with her fire engine red coif; her eyes closed and lips pouted with pristine 1970′s disco queen poise (where’s Andy Warhol when you need him?). Accordingly, the collection was largely colored by its StarGate-produced dance floor throbbers (“Only Girl (In The World),” “S&M”) and and airy Island-infused mid-tempo jams (“What’s My Name?” “Man Down”).
With Talk That Talk, her sixth studio album released on November 21, Rihanna has once again rih-invented, this time veering closer toward the Rated R menace, albeit not completely: She’s stripped away the metallic sheen of Rated R and given it a decidedly more street vibe.
Buttoned up in a sleeveless camouflage blouse, she appears sweaty and disheveled, her hair mussed as she grips her forehead. With a hungry glare and a dagger-sharp tongue firmly planted in the corner of her lips, she utterly oozes sex. But this isn’t a candle-lit dinner at the Four Seasons followed by a rose pedal-strewn romp in bed. This is a rough, rowdy back-alley FUCK on break during your mid-day work shift.
And that, in a nutshell, is the essence of Talk That Talk.
Tonight, Illuminati Princess Navy Commander Rihanna took to the stage of US X Factor to perform her latest #1 single, the Calvin Harris-produced “We Found Love,” for the very first time on TV. And how did she fare? Well…
IT WAS AMAZING.
Replicating the look and feel of the ’90′s grunge-inspired cornfield rave scene from the “We Found Love” video, the Bajan beauty was looking all sorts of sexy in a big ol’ puffy bomber jacket, a plaid top and some ripped jeans revealing a fuck-me-o’clock garter belt underneath. Mmm-MMM, RiRi!
Ri’s live rendition was as heart-racing and euphoric as the accompanying track, filled with flashing neon signs, fireworks shooting from every direction, and some of the most explosive energy I’ve ever witnessed coming from the Bajan sensation. She was absolutely flailing all over that stage!
And apart from the on-stage moshing during those epic post-chorus beat breakdowns, there was even some actual choreography on Rihanna’s part–she was stomping the shit outta that stage! Like, why is this the first time we’re seeing Ri really cut a rug? WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LI-I-I-I-I-IFE?!
The only major downside to the performance was that the backing track was far too loud, resulting in a weird and distracting clash between her live vocals and the actual song. Still, she trudged on like a champ–and seemingly had the time of her fucking life doing so.
Now I’ve seen my fair share of RiRi slagging over the past few weeks since the Talk That Talk era, so let me just clarify my position: I don’t care that she’s not the greatest singer. I don’t care that she’s not the greatest dancer. Rihanna is fucking FUN. Everything about her–from her personality, to her performances, to her music–is so thoroughly enjoyable and carefree. I adore her to bits and pieces. G4L ’til I die, bitches!
VIVA LA RIRI!
“We Found Love” was released on September 22. (iTunes)
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