After announcing her upcoming foray into music back in November, Kim Kardashian is finally prepared to unleash the fruits of her labor upon the world.

Earlier this morning, the professional Nicole Scherzinger lookalike visited On Air with Ryan Seacrest to premiere her debut single, “Jam,” produced by Ciara collaborator, The-Dream.

According to Ryan Seacrest’s official site, what had happened was Ciara was all like “The-Dream wants your number,” and then Kim was all like “Please, I’m sure he does,” and then Ciara was all like, “No seriously, he really wants to do a song with you,” and then The-Dream was all like, “Let’s just have fun. Let’s donate the proceeds, let’s just have fun with it don’t take yourself seriously. Try something you’ve never done before.”

I believe this is roughly the same exchange The Beatles had with producer George Martin before recording Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band.

Playing more like a Heidi Montag than a Paris Hilton production in the grand scheme of socialite singles, “Jam” is a dirt cheap club banger filled with mind-numbingly, impossibly generic lyrics (“Girls in the building / Fellas in the club / Boys spending money / Girls looking good”), lazily sung vocals and a fairly by-the-books bangin’ beat.

“They playin’ my jam / They playin’ my jam,” Kardashian’s monotone voice repeats again and again above the song’s pulsating chorus. God, she sounds so completely bored throughout, but hey–that’s what being a glamorous butt model is all about!

Kardashian will be donating all proceeds from the song to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, which is actually quite sweet.

That is, if the song generates proceeds to begin with…

Thanks to Rap-Up for the music link!

It’s Beatles Week at the X Factor!

And, as one of the only human beings on this planet who doesn’t care much for the Legendary Icons of Music Making (well, not until they dabbled with the Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds anyway), I can’t seem to muster much excitement for this week–except by using exclamation marks!

I can’t wait to see what they perform! Why can’t Katie Weasel just go away!

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So, this is something new and interesting.

The night before my interview with Sky Ferreira, I received a vaguely mysterious e-mail from MuuMuse reader Sam Lansky with an attachment entitled “Fame Fatale.” The e-mail suggested that the attached may assist me in preparing for my interview.

As soon as I began reading, I already knew: This had to be published immediately.

“Fame Fatale” is not only a remarkably in-depth analysis (and personal account) of Ferreira’s curious rise to fame, but a thoughtful contemplation of the manufacturing of the modern pop star and the very conventions of the music industry itself. It’s extremely well-researched, poses tough questions, and deserves your full attention.

With his permission, I’ve asked Sam to feature his article on MuuMuse. It’s an incredible piece, and I do highly recommend that all of my Muusers give it a thorough reading–even if it’s “tl;dr” territory.

I do, after all, hope to keep a literate company.

Click “Read More…” to read Sam Lansky’s “Fame Fatale: The Rise of Sky Ferreira.”

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