NO, BUT REALLY: STOP YOUR LIFE.

Nicola Roberts has just premiered the video for “Yo-Yo,” the third single off of her gorgeous debut album Cinderella’s Eyes, and it is a 100% flaw-free experience.

Playing like (Ginge) Barbie in the opening scenes, Queen Nicola puts on a haute-as-fuck fashion show for the lens while getting ready to go out for the night with her yo-yo of a (hunky) boyfriend. Effortlessly glam posing, Ms. Roberts! Aloud fans worldwide are beaming with pride.

Fast forward to the party, and we find the two now doing a bit of snuggle ‘n’ grind amidst the revelry. Cameras are flashing while they’re dirty dancing! But at the end of the night, is he really there for our girl? Watch and decide for yourself!

If the lighting and styling look familiar, that’s probably because the video was directed by photographer Freddie Helwig, who shot all of the brilliant album artwork for the Cinderella’s Eyes campaign. To make this shoot even more special, “Yo-Yo” is Helwig’s music video directorial debut.

Frankly, the video is the perfect companion to an already perfect song. Every shot is gorgeous, and Nicola looks absolutely stunning. By the time that crystalline middle eight comes creeping into the speakers and she begins agonizing and writhing up against the shower wall, it’s clear that Roberts has absolutely nailed it (again).

So, so proud! TEAM GINGE FOR LIFE.

“Yo-Yo” will be released on January 8. (iTunes UK)

Last week, The Saturdays released their third studio album: On Your Radar.

I’m still not sure if I’ll ever get around to writing a complete album review as I did for their super solid sophomore attempt Wordshaker (which I maintain is still VERY GOOD), but I can say that On Your Radar is just as excellent. Actually, it’s probably their best yet, especially considering the inclusion of “Notorious” (amazing) and “All Fired Up” (their best ever?), as well as some of the new uptempo cuts like “Get Ready Get Set” (LOVE!), “Faster” (kind of love!) and “For Myself.” (LOVE!)

But of all the new jams, there’s just one song that I’ve fallen for by far: “White Lies.”

From a producer’s standpoint, it’s hardly surprising: The track was crafted by two hugely talented Swede-pop geniuses: Carl Falk (of Nicole Scherzinger‘s “Don’t Hold Your Breath, Darren Hayes‘ “Black Out The Sun” and “Bloodstained Heart” and most importantly, Lindsay Lohan‘s “Disconnected”) and Rami Yacoub, responsible for basically all of …Baby One More Time and Oops!…I Did It Again. I mean…need I say more?

“White Lies” is absolutely brilliant–a surging, scorching pop number full of blazing four-to-the-floor synths, Nintendo-like 8-bit bleeps and blips and a soaring, guilt-ridden belter of a chorus: “Oooh, it’s time to talk about truth now/It’s time I/It’s that time that you know what you’re getting into now/These white lies, these white lies!” (Not to mention it’s MAJOR series of lyrics in general.) It’s explosive. It’s defining. It’s EVERYTHING.

As far as making a more stellar splash on the charts (which The Sats have long struggled to do), this track’s got enough of a potent power-pop mmph to really make a statement.

But after the lukewarm reception to the equally lukewarm “My Heart Takes Over” (dropping from #15 to #28 after just two weeks), an astonishingly dismal debut at #23 on the UK Albums Chart with On Your Radar, and murky waters regarding Una‘s pregnancy and Frankie‘s mystery illness (which has resulted in a weird “part-time commitment“), it’s not clear exactly where The Sats are headed after this. Well, besides on tour.

For now, let’s simply appreciate this complete and utter slice of pop perfection.

On Your Radar was released on November 21. (iTunes UK)

I’m fierce and I’m feeling mighty…mighty giving, in fact!

Earlier this year, Queen Kylie embarked on the massive tour known as Aphrodite Les Folies, spanning dozens of countries across the world including the UK, Japan, Australia, South Africa and the United States.

The dazzling production–filled with sequins, feathers, flying angels and glittering, half-naked Greek gods–was easily one of my personal highlights of 2011. It was a mayjah show! Can’t beat the feeling of live Kylie.

Luckily, the concert was filmed this summer at the O2 in London, leading to the release of Aphrodite Les Folies on November 28. It’s a gorgeous set–everything is beautiful. Now, all the lovers out there can get a bit closer and relive the experience!

To celebrate the release, MuuMuse is proud to be giving away 5 COPIES of the 2-CD/DVD edition of Aphrodite Les Folies: Live in London.

No, this ain’t no illusion! To enter to win, simply follow me on Twitter (@MuuMuse) and tweet the following phrase:

I want to experience the Mighty #Aphrodite with @MuuMuse! #LesFoliesDVD http://bit.ly/sVelJu

Five winners will be selected and notified on Monday, December 5. US entrants only please.

So what are you waiting for, cupid boys and girls? Get outta my way and enter NOW. Good luck!

Aphrodite was released in July of 2010. (iTunes)

Earlier this evening, I was merrily listening to the Femme Fatale Tour DVD audio (as I am wont to do) while walking out of the train station from work. In fact, I was so caught up listening to the live version of “Gimme More” (as I am wont to do) that during the almighty “MOAH MOAH MOAH” breakdown, I walked straight into a wall.

Finding this amusing, I took to Twitter and chronicled the epic tale. Then I went to dinner. Then I came back.

AND THEN BRITNEY RETWEETED ME…WITH A “LOL.”

Mind you: She’s already blessed me with a re-tweet earlier this year, and I didn’t even tag her in this one,
meaning only one thing–the Holy Spearit is truly watching over me.

I caused this.

I’ve since spent the past hour shaking, crying and running around the house. Following that, some quivering and weeping. Then some convulsing and sobbing. Then some seizing and bawling. Then a brief spell of dancing–now straight back to the crying. I CAN’T TAKE IT, TAKE IT, TAKE NO MORE.

I was born to make you LOL, Britney! ♥

THIS IS AMAZING.

Sorry, but I just–I absolutely live for moments when pop ladies I love talk about other pop ladies that I love.

Australian Empress of Pop Kylie Minogue sat down for an in-depth interview with the Sydney Morning Herald’s Andrew Hornery prior to her induction into the ARIA Hall of Fame last night. At one point, she was asked to compare herself to another reigning pop diva: The one and only Madonna.

So sayeth the ever-ravishing KM:

I’m a massive Madonna fan. Absolutely. I’ve only met her briefly. We have some friends in common. A message will go back and forwards–she says ‘Hi’ or I say ‘Hi.’ How can you not love Madonna? I know she’s got a new album coming out and I hope she kills it. I want her to do really, really well. As a fan, I want some great Madonna music.

Awwwww! Yay! Kylie loves Madonna loves Kylie (and yes, we all knew that already.) The world is a better place.

Still, it’s so lovely to see a diva compliment a diva. For more of that (plus a healthy helping of shade on the side), you must check out Rich Juzwiak‘s (FourFour) essential new splice ‘n’ dice piece, “Divas on divas.” Brilliant, as always.

Earlier this evening, Godney did so tweet:

Found a xmas gift for my sister in Peru – so I can cross her off my list!  Not the best weather where I’m at today…

The photo finds Queen B’s hand lifting a window curtain to reveal the maybe-not-so-good weather of Bogotá (not that we’d ever be able to tell because of the blue Instagram tint, but let’s just go with it). On her hand? This Illuminati-esque triangle tattoo, which most fans (including me) are still puzzled by to this day. When did that even happen? She did get that star tattoo on the same hand with Jamie-Lynn back in December of ’06. Is that the star? Why’s it different?

Also: Has anyone else noticed “Britney” has stopped tweeting with “-Brit” at the end? Has she taken full control of her Twitter account?

God, I so love this. It kind of reminds me of 2006/2007 Rebellionney, when our beloved Godney used to write long poems like “Remembrance of Who I Am” and create insane fan polls for her fans to decide the title for her upcoming studio album. (I myself continue to pray for the day Omg is Like Lindsay Lohan Like Okay Like is finally released.)

My princess is such a mystery. One day, she’ll write us a good book one day. A good, mysterious book.

VIVA LA BRIT BRIT!

Song stem leaks are a strange new phenomenon in today’s (you drive me) crazy world of pop.

For those unfamiliar with the term, stems are the lil’ bits and pieces that make up a full song–from the raw main melodies, to the nearly unheard backing vocals, to the tiniest electro-blips below the main beat.

Yesterday, a handful of stems from some of Brit Brit‘s signature tracks–from “…Baby One More Time” to “Gimme More” to “Womanizer” to “Scary” were uploaded all on one SoundCloud. For fellow Britnuts, this is a rare treat behind the scenes (and into the studio) of some of B’s most beloved cuts.

On the “Toxic” stem, we hear Britney repeatedly trying out the first verse, ever-so-slightly changing the enunciation each time. “Gimme More” gives us some o’ dat breathy deliciousness (“MOAH!!!”), along with a taste of Miss Keri Baby‘s background vocals. “Don’t Keep Me Waiting” finds Britishney out in full force (“coldah than the freezuh”), while “Scary” gives us some strong, unfiltered lead vocals. It all sounds amazing!

Sure, it’s not new music per se–just another way to rediscover some of the Holy Spearit’s greatest offerings.

Gimme More by EF-Pop

Criminal by EF-Pop

Toxic by EF-Pop

Scary by EF-Pop

LISTEN TO ALL THE STEMS NOW.

2011: YEAR OF THE SPEARS.

Yesterday night, Pop Princess, Mighty Aphrodite and Ultimate Disco Diva Kylie Minogue was formally inducted into the ARIA Hall of Fame (that’s the Aussie equivalent for the Grammy’s for those unaware) for her contribution to the music industry over the past 25 years.

After a brief spell as a brunette earlier this month, the newly blonde and beaming pop princess accepted the award from music critic Molly Meldrum and Australia’s Prime Minister Julia Gillard before delivering a loving, heartfelt speech thanking her family (Dannii‘s in the audience!), her management team and her tall drink of water of a boyfriend, Andres Velencoso and her fans for supporting her on her journey as an international pop superstar.

Please watch the full video below to see the entire acceptance speech. Absolutely gorgeous (as always)!

So, so proud of you Kylie!